Life of a Substitute Teacher

when the world changes

2006-07-13T22:33:00.000-05:00

I don't know what to think. A year ago today, I was looking forward to my student teaching at CHS, looking forward to graduating from college, and looking forward to starting a high school band director job. My grandmother and I would talk daily about teaching. My hardest decision was if my MM would be in conducting, educatio, or composition. I knew where I was and where I was going. That was a year ago.

Since then, my mentor is in Germany, my other mentor is now at another university. I haven't found a job, and am in fact about ready to give up and go back to school if I don't find anything soon. I have the name of a contact person who can help get me in touch with the right people if I want to pursue studies in the med school prerequisite classes (you don't have to be a pre-med major to go to med school, just have a high enough GPA in ten classes, a good MCAT score, and a bachelor's degree). Oh, and try as I might, I can no longer pick up the phone and call my grandmother whenever I want to as she passed on last month.

My life has changed completely. When I entered college, when I graduated college, I knew where I was going. But now, I no longer do. What happened?

For starters, I didn't plan right. I knew what I wanted educationally, but not professionally, and quite frankly, I still don't. I know I love teaching music, conducting, composing, and performing, but I also know that this is just the start of where I want to be professionally. I also know that, try as I might, I am getting no where in this job search. I've sent out over 50 resumes, and have only had one interview for a job I really didn't want as it went against everything I stood for in music education.

Second, I let the need to fulfill a goal get in the way of the need to change that goal to something else. Had I realized all this four years ago, I could have easily taken those ten classes in place of the second major I was pursuing.

Third/Final,life is changing so much, and it's gone so far away from what I originally planned for it to be; I guess you can never set the future in stone though. I guess taking an unexpected turn can be good, but at the same time, it is hard to abandon dreams that I still wish to fulfill. What do I really want to do? Teach music, conduct, compose, be able to treat/diagnose musicians with problems related to their professions. How do I do that though? I would need a DMA as well as an MD. I'd be in debt forever.

Reservations about No Reservations

2006-06-19T22:53:00.000-05:00

I have to stop watching travel shows. I do not have the money yet to go to the places I see depicted on the Travel Channel, such as, oh, Indonesia. I want to go there, experience it, and part of me wants to indulge in the culture. I've already fallen in love with the region, long before I really saw anything about it ever. I bought a bamboo windchime in college at an import store, made in Indonesia. Fell in love with it. Are you asking about the Noah Bell? That's from India. Both are places I now want to go to, even for a summer. So tonight, while watching Anthony Bourdain on television in a little cabin on a lake, the cameraman showed a set of windchimes. The same windchimes I am holding in my hand right now (or will be when I'm done typing this sentence).

But alas, I cannot go there yet. I know I've always been a person to ask someone else, "Why are you making excuses?" but this is an instance where I need to do so. I do not have the money to go there yet. So, why am I instead downloading music from Indonesia and India on iTunes? Because right now it's the closest I'll get to those countries.

~~~~~

Okay, I knew those hooks in my ceiling from a lamp when I was a kid would come in handy - one is holding the Indonesian bamboo windchimes while the other is holding the Noah Bell. I just have to be careful how I move in this room while writing and composing as any small movement will start a cacophony of bells. Beautiful.

~~~~~

If you are wondering where Indonesia is, it is a chain of islands north-west of Australia, between the Pacific and Indian Oceans. It is in the same neck of the woods as Borneo (remember Survivor?) and Papua New Guiana (Going Tribal on Travel Channel).

~~~~~

So why am I so enamored with the music of Indonesia? Other than I have fallen in love with it? There is so much of it, so many varieties of cultures. Search for the term "Music of Indonesia" in iTunes and you will get back 150 results, with even more results if you click on individual albums, all catalogued and published by The Smithsonian Institute. I don't know where to begin on downloads, and am afraid that I will miss something. I know that I can come back to it at any point, but I want it all now. I love it.

My heart is at home, but my spirit wanders the world!

2006-06-12T22:22:00.000-05:00

Just got done watching Anothony Bourdain's No Reservations on the Travel Channel, and I have to say that I am once again struck by the beauty and simplicity of a foreign culture (is the word "foreign" easier to spell in another language? What about "language?"). He had a travel guide this time from his office in New York, and she was my age about, so he ended up doing a lot of the things she wanted to do: party, play in arcades, karaoke (he didn't sing though - or at least they didn't show it). They showed a kimchi factory. Beautiful. That mixed with some crab and some raman noodles, and add some onion and celery too, and you have a meal. Love the stuff, but don't think I'll be making it anytime soon - I don't trust my cooking that much (and I've seen my relatives try sauer kraut - same method/basic principle, slightly different culture/ingredients).

Kimchi Recipe (if you dare!) from http://www.davidtinney.net/korean-kimchi-recipe.html. There are many varieties, and if in doubt, just go to your nearest oriental grocer.

Kimchi Recipe:
2 Chinese cabbages
5-10 spring onions
Sea salt or other non-iodized salt, at least 100 g
4 heaped tablespoons (about 20 g) Korean chili powder
2-3 cloves garlic, crushed
2 tablespoonfuls sugar, any kind
Tablespoonful kim chi sauce
Small piece of ginger (5 g), crushed, or teaspoonful powdered ginger
Half an onion (optional)

Method:

Rinse the cabbages, then quarter them lengthwise, discard the stems, and then chop the cabbages laterally, which should leave you with the largest pieces measuring perhaps 5 cm on a side. Don't get too carried away while doing this.

Now that we have lots of little bits of cabbage, it's time to salt them. Place the cabbage in a clean plastic bag or equivalent and sprinkle salt over each layer. The best kind of salt is sea salt, although non-iodized table salt will do. This will create a brine solution with the cabbage juice.
To ensure the cabbage is properly salted, sprinkle salt onto your wet hands, then rub it into the cabbage pieces. Press the leaves in your hand to squeeze as much water out of them as possible. Once finished, tie up the bag and set it aside for 5-6 hours. Check it after three hours to ensure that everything is all right, stirring the mixture if necessary.

Take the cabbage out of the salt solution and rinse it if necessary. It should be a lot softer than it was. Again, remove surplus water. Place cabbage in a sealable plastic box. Add the spring onions, chopped into small pieces. Crush the garlic and ginger in a press and mix in. You may also add half an onion, finely diced, if you wish.

It is also recommended to add kim chi sauce. This is the only ingredient that you can't always buy at a non-Korean supermarket. There are several different kinds, many of which contain fish or other seafood such as oysters. You only need one tablespoonful.

Add the chili powder. It is possible to use other kinds of chili powder; if you use hot chili powder, you should reduce the amount. Add two tablespoonfuls of sugar.

Mash the chili powder into the leaves as you did in much the same way with the salt. If the color doesn't seem dark enough, add more chili powder. It's a good idea to wear gloves while doing this.

Put the containers aside for three days.

Finally the kimchi is ready. It should be soft in consistency, but not too mushy, with a little crunchiness left in the larger pieces. You can eat it as is, or use it in your favorite Korean recipes and it makes a great stir fry, too.

Writing Blog

2006-05-31T15:15:00.000-05:00

For all those interested, I've created a writing blog to post drafts of things I've written or I am writing. In some cases, these are just exercises or ramblings, in other cases they are chapters part of larger works. Some are non-fiction, some are fiction, some are even fan-fic (only so I can write something quickly to practice).

Please feel free to read through it (and comment on the writing!):

http://arizonamyrie3.blogspot.com/

How did I go in this direction?

2006-05-31T01:32:00.000-05:00

It's been awhile since I've updated, and my hands are already tired from typing the last several days, and scribbling with a pencil when I've been away from my computer. Still teaching at DMS - won't change that part of my life if I can help it. I love it there. Showed our guitar instructor Finale today, and he's hooked.

Finished subbing a long time ago, and found myself with extra time on my hands. So, I wrote several outlines for small stories that will probably never go anywhere. Then, I started editing a story about a necklace - it's more interesting if you know more, maybe I'll post part of it here. Then, I thought of additional characters for that short story, and what was once a ten page story is now thirty pages and three chapters long. I've outlined the general plot of where I want to go with the story, and I just want to keep working. I love boredom! Now, it's one-thirty in the morning and I know I should get sleep, but my mind keeps weaving the story on me. I love it. I know I need to sleep, but thankfully, my family knows that when the creative bug hits, it keeps me awake all night long (I lose the rhythm once I stop - I guess I'll lose it when I go back).

It's the same feeling I felt from composing, only less work and instant gratification when I go back and read the work I've done. Need to stop though or I will lose the feeling in my hands from too much typing!

culture shock

2006-04-28T23:33:00.000-05:00

Well, it's been awhile since an actual post, and the long-term sub position has come and gone. In the meantime, I've become addicted to Travel Channel and the Documentary Channel on sattelite - more specifically shows that force you to become part of another culture, even if momentarily. Like, I found a clip of Anthony Bourdain on Travel Channel where he is in Indonesia and is obviously about to snark on something, when, there is suddenly the Islamic call to prayer from a nearby Mosque. All of a sudden, another Mosque starts with its call, and soon, AB is telling us how he is hearing five separate calls at once. I love the sound of the call to prayer - it reminds me of Saturdays in college when I would go to the import stores and linger with the other students there listening to NPR and talking politics, culture, and anything else intellectual. I joined the Comparative Religions group that way. Whenever I hear the call to prayer on TV or anywhere else (where else would I hear it in my life in this country right now?) I can smell the incense and feel the quiet reverence for another culture - one that is not my own and will never be as I am an American.

I went on iTunes just now and searched the term "Call to Prayer" and had country, rock, and even jazz music come up. I have some world music on there, from Iran and India, yet I know that none of it comes close to what I want to hear - the actual call itself.

Listening to the thirty-second snippets online of what "Americans" (I use the term as a stereotype for this sentence) assume to be a "call to prayer" brings me into perspective on what our culture is, but I cannot define it with mere words. Everything on there that I listened to originated with a musician in the US. Nothing showed the reverence and mystery of another culture at all (with a small exception to Wynton Marsalis whose clip I almost bought).

Hearing the call to prayer seems to remind me, beyond the Saturdays in college, of the fact that I am not right now part of something bigger. I feel isolated in our capitalist culture at the moment, isolated from free mystery and free piety. I feel isolated from freedom from propoganda and advertisement. We're never really free from any of that in this world, but still, I want to know what it would be like to wake up early in the morning to have to take care of my family while my husband tended the fields. I want to know what other peoples' lives are like in foreign (eg: not USA) cultures. Watching these "adventure" shows gives me a glimpse.

Another thing - the travel shows in general. Most of the shows that I've seen show an American as a tourist, looking for that little treasure to take back to show their neighbors in the rural or suburban US. That little snow globe in the mouse trap or something (another AB ad here). So much of our middle class US culture is about getting those treasures to show off to our peers. But, what if it was different? What if we traveled for the sake of learning about another culture? True, go to England on a US tour-group tour and you see the culture. But, you eat at McDonalds, sleep at a Hilton, and watch CBS and CNN on TV (oh, and travel on a Greyhound bus). Travel is different. You give control of your life over to the people that live where you are visiting. You trust them to take you in and keep you safe. They trust you to follow their lead. And it is all good. I want that. I want the adventure of meeting a stranger who will guide me into their culture. Show me what it is like to be an outsider to the US looking in and see what I've been missing all these years. Give me a life lesson that I will be humbled by and learn from.

We're all part of something bigger. Right now it's 11:47 in my time zone. Everyone else in my family has gone to sleep except for me - this probably includes my cousins in other time zones as well (except those in Las Vegas). The "world" around me is assuming that it is night and everyone is going to bed. However, a mile from here, the night shift workers are less than one hour into their shift. A country away from here, it is thirty degrees warmer/cooler (depending which direction you travel). Across the globe, a woman is preparing rice for a noon meal for her children. Somewhere else, a young boy looks up at the sky while tending to a field. Somewhere else, an elderly man holds the hand of his dying wife with his children looking on. This is life at its most basic levels of survival, and I want to take part in that.

There is a give and take in life however. Would I give up my nice comfortable bed? Not easily. Change my diet to suddenly eat red meat again? I'd rather go to India and blend in with the Hindi. Eat a raw seal? I already eat raw tuna. I call that sushi! I eat wasabi too. It's my preferable condiment, along with soy sauce. At the end of the day, even if it's the worst day of my life, would I give up the creature comforts I've grown accustomed to in the US? Maybe not, but I wouldn't know until I've tried.

I'm ready to try something new. I've been ready since I knew that I finished college. For so long I've lived by the ideals I and my relatives have created for me, and never really got the chance to see who I really am. Now, I'm discovering a new side to me. I'm discovering that adventure really does exist outside of movies - you just have to allow yourself to give control of your life momentarily over to someone completely different from you. Allow yourself to immerse into something new. That's an adventure.

Now to find that call to prayer...

Testing, Testing, One, Two...

2006-04-18T12:03:00.000-05:00

Yes, so this is just a cheesy post so I can try to do something else somewhere else. Hopefully my lack of knowledge of this will work!

for the TWoP Pixel Challenge #224 - Celebrity Cooking Challenge - two of the snarkiest shows on television!

Jury Duty Update

2006-03-28T00:05:00.000-06:00

It's the last week in March of 2006 and I have yet to recieve a jury summons. I am in the clear!

Spring Break

2006-03-27T23:53:00.000-06:00

I've officially past the half-way point in my placements at WMS and I am in love with this profession. The students have been wonderful, despite losing my voice a couple of times, and it has truly been a good learning experience so far. The baby meanwhile came a week early and I ended up subbing for two teachers at the same time for an entire week! I at first thought it meant extra money, but it now turns out that the district doesn't pay extra to subs for subbing in-house for another teacher. Oh well. I can't complain though because my principal has found a way for me to keep the higher pay rate when I start the second post.

Saturday was the Solo and Ensemble at CHS and all of my private students from DMS are going to state! I'm thrilled. I spent the day working in the office verifying scores and entering them into the computer. I would have helped pick up ratings sheets, however, a recent injury has me on crutches. I'd much rather be in pain and active than be laid up ill or injured.

Awesome news from Saturday though - I got home that night and there was a big manilla envelope from the Wisconsin DPI with my name on it. Guess what was in it? My brand new shiny teaching license!!! Getting that in the mail has officially made me more relaxed about finding and applying for jobs because I officially have that piece of paper in my hands now that says that I am legally able to teach in a classroom. It's just that extra step towards my career.

So, it's a Monday night and nearly midnight besides. Why am I posting so late? It's Spring Break where I'm subbing, and I'm enjoying this break in the schedule and lesson planning (Shoot! I didn't do my lesson plans on Friday before I left!!! That's what I forgot to do!!!) although it means a week to play catch up in other areas of my life, including e-mail friends I haven't seen in ages, which is my next task...

I shouldn't have had all that coffee...

proving I waste way too much time in the morning...

2006-02-27T06:30:00.000-06:00

Put an X by the movies you've seen. If you get more than 70, you're a true movie junkie.

Here are my results:

(x)Pirates of the Caribbean
(x)Boondock Saints
(x)The Mexican
(x)Fight Club
( )Starsky and Hutch
(x)Neverending Story
(x)Blazing Saddles
( )Garden State
(x)The Princess Bride
(x)Young Frankenstien
( )AnchorMan
(x)Napoleon Dynamite
( )Saw
(x)White Noise
(x)White Oleander
(x)Anger Management
total here: 12

( )50 First Dates
( )Jason
( )Scream
( )Scream 2
( )Scream 3
(x)Scary Movie
( )Scary Movie 2
( )Scary Movie 3
(x)American Pie
( )American Pie 2
( )American Wedding
(x)Harry Potter
(x)Harry Potter 2
(x)Harry Potter 3
( )Harry Potter 4
( )Resident Evil I
( )Resident Evil 2
(x)The Wedding Singer
( )Little Black Book
total here: 6

(x)The Village
( )Donnie Darko
(x)Lilo & Stitch
(x)Finding Nemo
(x)Finding Neverland
( )13 Ghosts
(x)Signs
( )The Grinch
(x)Texas Chainsaw Masscare
( )White Chicks
(x)Butterfly Effect
(x)Thirteen going on 30
( ) I,Robot
( )Dodgeball
( )Universal Soldier
( )A Series Of Unfortunate Events
( )Along Came A Spider
(x)Deep impact
total here: 9

(x)KingPin
(x)Never Been Kissed
(x)Meet The Parents
( )Meet the Fockers
( )Eight Crazy Nights
(x)A Cinderella Story
( )The Terminal
( )The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( )Passport to Paris
(x)Dumb & Dumber
(x)Final Destination
(x)Final Destination 2
( ) Halloween
( )The Ring
( )The Ring 2
(x)Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle
(x)Practical Magic
(x)Chicago
( )Ghost Ship
( )From Hell
( )Hellboy
(x)Secret Window
( )I Am Sam
( )The Whole Nine Yards
( )The Whole Ten Yards
( )The Day After Tomorrow
( )Child's Play
( )Bride Of Chucky
(x)Ten Things I Hate About You
( )Just Married
( )Gothika
(x)Nightmare on Elm Street
(x)Sixteen Candles
( )Bad Boys
( )Bad Boys 2
( )Joy Ride
( )Seven
( )Oceans Eleven
( )Oceans Twelve
( )Identity
total here: 14

( )Lone Star
( )Predator I
( )Predator II
(x)Independence day
( )Cujo
( )Bronx Tale
( )Darkness Falls
( )Christine
(x)ET
( )Children of the Corn
( )My Boss' Daughter
( )Maid in Manhattan
( )Frailty
( )Best Bet
(x)How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(x)She's All That
(x)Calendar Girls
( )Sideways
(x)Mars Attacks
total here: 6

(x)Event Horizon
( )Ever After
(x)Forrest Gump
( )Big Trouble in Little China
( )X-men 1
( )X-men 2
( )Catch Me If You Can
(x)The Others
(x)Freaky Friday
( )Reign of Fire
( )The Hot Chick
( )Swimfan
( )Miracle
( )Old School
( )Ray
(x)The Notebook
(x)K-Pax
total here: 6

(x)Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
(x)Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
(x)Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
( )A Walk to Remember
( )Boogeyman
( )Hitch
(x)The Fifth Element
(x)Star Wars episode I: The Phantom Menace
( )Star Wars episode II: Attack of The Clones
( )Star Wars episode III: Revenge of The Sith
(x)Star Wars episode IV: A New Hope
(x)Star Wars episode V: Empire Strikes Back
(x)Star Wars episode VI: Return of The Jedi
( )Troop Beverly Hills
( )Swimming with Sharks
(x)Air Force One
( )For Richer or Poorer
( )Trainspotting
( )People Under the Stairs
( )Blue Velvet
(x)Sound of Music
(x)Parent Trap
( )The Burbs
(x)The Terminator
( )Empire Records
( )SLC Punk
(x)Meet Joe Black
( )Wild Girls
( )A Clockwork Orange
( )The Order
(x)Spiderman
(x)Spiderman 2
(x)Amelie
total here: 16

( )Mean Girls
(x)Shrek
( )Shrek 2
( )The Incredibles
( )Collateral
(x)The Fast & The Furious
(x)2 Fast 2 Furious
( )Sky Captain Of The World Of Tomorrow
( )Closer
total here: 3

(x)Titanic
( )Saved!
(x)Bowling for Columbine
(x)Farenheit 9/11
(x)The Sixth Sense
(x)Artificial Intelligence (AI)
(x)Love Actually
( )Shutter
(x)Ella Enchanted
(x)Princess Diaries
( )Princess Diaries 2
( )Constantine
(x)Million Dollar Baby
( )Envy
( )Eurotrip
( )Malibu's Most Wanted
(x)Big Daddy
( )Black Sheep
(x)The Breakfast Club
(x)West Side Story
total here: 12

(x)A Christmas Story
(x)Spanglish
(x)Pulp Fiction
( )Sleepover
( )The Evil Dead
( )Killer Klowns From Outer Space
( )The Seed of Chucky
( )Vanilla Sky
(x)Nightmare Before Christmas
(x)Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind
(x)Interview With The Vampire
(x)The Crow
( )Purple Rain
( )Reservoir Dogs
(x)Wayne's World
total here: 8

(x)Wayne's World 2
( )21 Grams
( )Blow
(x)Edward Scissorhands
( )Clerks
(x)Beauty and the Beast
( )Guess Who
( )Monster in-law
( )Elf
(x)Stuart Little
(x)Stuart Little 2
( )Mall Rats
( )Chasing Amy
(x)Dogma
(x)Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
total here: 7

(x)Beetlejuice
(x)The Last Samurai
( )The Amityville Horror
(x)The Aviator
(x)Romeo and Juliet
( )Barbershop
( )Beauty Shop
(x)Legally Blonde
(x)Legally Blonde 2
( )The Forgotten
( )Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen
( )The Grudge
Total here: 6

Total : 105

Not nearly as much as the person who e-mailed this to me, plus, having just graduated from college and having been unemployed for a month needs to count for about thirty to forty of the list.

That Feeling...

2006-02-19T15:30:00.000-06:00

The first time I observed at CHS, I had that feeling, the feeling that told me that being in the building was good for me somehow. Then, SCT approved me to student teach. And now, he's officially announced his retirement.

SCT is actually retiring and several parents and students have made me promise to apply for his job.

Wow!

Blizzard update

2006-02-16T20:53:00.000-06:00

Only four school districts in our general area were open today, and all four closed early.

It's still snowing, and temperatures are now plummeting. We'll still probably have school tomorrow at WMS, but it might be a delay. Just a gut instinct.

Blizzard

2006-02-16T17:03:00.000-06:00

The blizzard warning we are in until midnight was cute up until I saw my father using both his and MY computer to play Civilization on (almost freezing mine as I was still logged on at the same time and using several applications). This was after he decided to dump spoiled food down the toilet as he hasn't repaired the disposal. Now, my room smells like a combination of spoiled food and guy-b.o. but it's the only place in the house that's quiet.

Over 100 schools were closed today, including area four-year universities that never close.

I'm stuck here.

For a long time.

Or at least until the police department says we can drive on city streets again.

2006-02-16T02:18:00.000-06:00

All of our area news networks have their "School Closings" pages and systems ready!!!

Can't Sleep --- Impending Snow Day

2006-02-16T01:54:00.000-06:00

According to a news article by Barbara Walters on ABC, here are the top five germiest jobs:

5.) Doctor
4.) Radio DJ (??)
3.) Banker
2.) Accountant
1.) Teacher

-----------------------------------

With that said, I began my new job today at the middle school, and I was nervous until my first rehearsal, which for me was my best middle school rehearsal ever. I was still a little wordy, but better. My conducting was clean (SCT if you're reading this, notice that). The teachers there (three total!!!) have worked out a system of communication that allow the students to know when they are ready to start and when they demand attention, and it really works. We didn't have these at CHS/CMS and I could tell a big difference.

Today was the second of two get to know you days, with Friday being my first day as a sub at the school. Good news is I get paid for today and even had full privileges as a teacher in the building. I even get my own keys and my own e-mail address!!! And my own desk!!! Still share an office though.

Thus begins the first of two band placements at this school. If only getting a full time job for fall was this easy!

-----------------------------------

Meanwhile, the city I am in is projected to recieve 10 to 12 inches of snow in the next twenty-four hours. At the end of the day today as the teachers were getting ready to leave, the secretary came on and told the staff to have their emergency phone trees ready and the ringers on their phones on. One of the other teachers looked at me and said "Well, we're closed tomorrow," and started clearing off her desk for me.

A snow day always excites me, even if I don't have to work, because I know my students are excited for this.

Weather Channel predicts only 6 to 10 inches, so maybe the central line of the storm has moved south. It did say though that the snow would not let up until 10 am Friday morning. Yay!!!

We're finally getting snow in Wisconsin!!!

Civil Service Strikes Again

2006-02-03T10:44:00.000-06:00

It is the dawn of a new day (well, somewhere), and I now get to face the reality of the letter I recieved yesterday: jury duty. Well, I had anticipated this at some point in the last year since I recieved a letter in early February 2005 to fill out the official questionaire for the county, however, just my luck that I'd get called at some point.

Last year I managed to write a letter to the judges asking to be removed from the list until I finished college. Well, I've graduated and now that I'm just starting a part-time subbing job, I get called to civil service.

I'm glad that I'm getting the chance to serve, but, why can't I get called in June. Or July. I'd even volunteer for this during the summer months.

Just not at the start of a new job!!!

Unschooling Continued - Direct Response to CNN Article

2006-02-02T15:19:00.000-06:00

Setup: There is an article at CNN about Unschooling, a new trend that is sweeping the world of home-schooling, which is already a controversial topic in the world of education. I suggest you read this article before you read any further below.

This is my direct response to the article itself, and the comments made within it. Quotes from the article are in bold/italic typeset. My responses are in a normal typeset.

---------------------------------------------------------------

"I don't want to sound pompous, but I think I am learning a little bit more, because I can just do everything at my own pace," said Naliah Ellis, a 10-year old from Marietta, Georgia, who has been unschooled for most of her life.

While she is correct to say that she is able to learn things at her own pace, there is no real way to assess how well she is learning what she is learning about. Without a curriculum, there is no way to create a system to measure what the child is learning about or what he/she may need to improve upon. Testing in our schools, home schooling included, is done to see how effectively a student has learned a subject and a teacher has taught that same subject.

Another aspect of this statement is that as a ten year old, she has not yet needed to make the right of passage from elementary school to middle school, a passage that many student need help with. True, eliminating schooling in general will make sure that she cannot fail at middle school, it will also make sure that she cannot succeed in that type of setting. There are published studies available from the US Department of Education concerning bridging this gap. There is a problem at this age in switching analysis of reading from analyzing fiction to analyzing non-fiction. This is one of the main problems with the middle school system at this point in time that qualified teachers across the nation are addressing.

Naliah's day starts about 11 am., her typical wake-up time.

While some studies have shown that childrens' and adolescents' body clocks differ from the schedules kept by a majority of schools, learning to adapt to the corporate work-day is extremely important for success in life after school.

She studies Chinese, reading, writing, piano, and martial arts.

While I agree that these are all important subjects, there are three mainlined areas of the standard curriculum missing: science, math, and social studies. While studying Chinese could include the social issues surrounding people living in China, it often is assumed to mean, "studying Chinese language." Math and science are two key areas that our country needs to catch up on, and while it is possible that she has been assessed as being highly gifted in these two areas, more than likey she is not.

Educational psychology also dictates that a student, if given the opportunity, will only work hard at subjects they are good at, therefore improving confidence in those subjects and decreasing skills in the subjects that are a challenge. If Naliah is indeed creating her own curriculum, then she is not really able to learn about math and science.

She works on what she wants, when she wants.

While this may be okay from an outside observer's perspective, and for a part of her day, there lies a problem in that part of the job of an educator is to teach the child how to fit into our society and culture. A good part of our culture is dicated by routines and schedules. You get up at a certain time to go to work, take your break at a certain time, leave at a certain time. If you need to go somewhere, that is scheduled into your day as well. Occurances like jury duty are scheduled ahead of time as well. We need to learn to live with a schedule as a majority of our culture does.

She'll even watch some TV - science documentaries are a favorite...

While I am not against TV nor am I against Naliah watching documentaries, the fact that she is watching these shows that she is starved for knowledge. The act of watching the documentary is providing her with the curriculum that she is being denied by her unschooling. There is an obvious interest in this subject area that cannot be explored further in her current educational setting. If she does wish to explore this further, she must ask someone she knows to explain it, and at this point I would hope her mother would be able to or least take her to the library to do so.

...until her day comes to an end at 2 a.m.

Why on earth would a ten year old be allowed to be up at this time? What could possibly be this important that she could do other than watch the drunkards going home from the bars? Music cannot be practiced at this time of day due to noise ordinances and the common decency of allowing people to sleep, unless they live in the country. Reading is okay at this time, and studying school subjects as well. But, how often are we adults faced with finding something to do at this time of day?

Another point against this is the fact that our bodies were designed by nature to follow the flow of the sun. The lack of light signals our bodies to become tired and we sleep, the introduction of light reversely wakes us up. Stormy days are evidence to this fact; we are more tired on days with less light than those with more. Seasonal Adjustment Disorder is another example of this problem. Nothing good can really come from allowing a child to stay up until two in the morning.

[Holt] believed parents should not duplicate school in their homes.

This is a statement that I agree with. Parents really shouldn't duplicate schools in their homes unless they themselves live in a school. Unless a parent is fully trained in education, and qualified enough to teach all the subjects that they will teach, then they should not turn their dining rooms into a classroom. Part of the No Child Left Behind Act stipulates that a teacher, including all special education teachers, is certified to teach all subjects that they teach. This is also part of the fair and equal education laws that dictates that a child be able to recieve an education that is fair and equal to the education of every other child within a jurisdiction, whether that be local or federal. By duplicating a school within the home, the parents are going against federal and state laws that protect their child's education.

There are no mandatory books, no curriculum, no tests and no grades. Naliah's parents are in touch with the local school district and she takes the district's required tests.

Generally, these "required tests" are the same tests mandated by No Child Left Behind and are basic proficiency exams. It is good that the local school system is weighing in on Naliah's education, becuase otherwise, she would not be recieving any.

The addition of tests and measurements however is in direct contradition to the idea of a lack of curriculum. There has to be some guidelines set up that Naliah has to work towards, otherwise she would be unable to pass these required tests.

But proponents of the public education system suggest these children may be missing a key part of the educational experience. "There is nothing like the texture of kids having contact with each other, making friends and relating to different adults in a school setting." said David Tokofsky, a longtime educator and member of the Los Angeles Unified School District Board of Education.

This is one of the main arguments used against home-schooling. Indeed, there is nothing like the experiences gained in school, however, there are still alternative arguments to this.

One argument is the fact that parents already pay school taxes, and their money is going to support this school that their children are not using. It's throwing away money. Another argument comes in the fact that parents are voting for elected officials in the school board to represent their voices for the common good of the educational system. These parents, between voting and paying taxes, are still contributing to the public education system without participating in it. Their loss? Somewhat. At least in Wisconsin, these same parents are still able to send their children to school "a la carte": they can pick and choose what classes their children will attend and teach the rest at home; taking the best and leaving the rest. Children learning within these settings then need to adapt to two separate mindsets: the idea of following the schedule at school, and the lack of one at home.

Naliah, who would be in 4th grade if she attended a regular school, seems to enjoy the "unschooled" lifestyle, even if she's a bit confused when asked what exactly she is learning. "I actually don't know what I'm learning," Naliah said. "I think I'm just having a good time."

While enjoying the act of learning is important to the actual learning process, Naliah still needs to be able to identify what she knows. She would probably say she knows how to play piano, and she knows how to read. She knows she can speak some Chinese, and she can earn a belt in her martial arts. However, without tests of form beyond those required by a school system, a child cannot fully grasp what they have learned and how far they have grown.

--------------------------------------------------------------

My Conclusion:

Overall, there are more scientific studies to prove that this does not work as compared to those that prove otherwise. I am appalled that there are actually people out there who think that it is allowable for a child to do this to herself. Unless Naliah is the exception, and I highly doubt that she is, then she and her parents are causing her more harm than good. This cannot lead her to a successful adulthood that is an integral part of our society and culture. There are multiple aims of schools in our country, one is to educate, and another is to prepare the child for their life as a contributing member of our society. Unschooling can do neither.

As an individual responding to this article, and not an educator, I feel the need to express my opinion that there is also a high risk that the child could easily become lazy. She is missing the experiences of school that lead to good memories from youth. She is missing out on sports and music classes. She is missing out on learning opinions beyond what her parents are influencing her to think. She is missing out on a life beyond just her family, a life that will shape who she will become, if she is allowed to succeed in the world.

Unschooling - The Art of Denying Education

2006-02-02T15:11:00.000-06:00

Just online again reading the news, and here's an interesting tidbit that I don't know how I feel about. A new educational trend is sweeping the home-schooling portion of our population: unschooling.

Unschooling is a form of homeschooling that has no curriculum and the child sets his/her pace and what he/she will learn about for the day. There is an article at CNN about it, and it will be on Anderson Cooper 360 tonight as well at 9 pm central time. The article discusses the pros of this type of schooling, which is very flexible for the child. However, it doesn't really delve into the cons of this teaching style.

For starters, we are educating our children in a middle class setting that teaches our children to eventually live in a middle class society that values structure and rules. If you are not teaching a child to follow a socially-set structure, he/she will have a harder time adapting later in life. Another con of the system is that the lack of curriculum will hinder learning in areas that does not interest the child. If a child never studies math, he/she will never learn how to deal with numbers, money, or taxes. There are also problems with the child learning how to behave in social settings and problems with socialization.

The article mentions how this child in particular only studies certain subjects: Chinese language, reading, writing, martial arts, and playing piano. While some of the activities she is learning about can cause development in other areas of the brain related to math and science, there is no real effort to pursue these subjects other than watching documentaries on television.

As a public educator, though young, I cannot see how this type of learning situation would benefit a majority of students in our country. While this could work for students who are highly gifted and cannot fit into our school socially, it does not work for the average or below average child.

Public education opens minds to the possibilities of other subjects that could be of interest to children. I have never met a child who has not discovered something new at school that they would have discovered on their own through unschooling. Home schooling is one thing, unschooling is completely different and with the exception of the rarest of cases, should not be used as a model for good educational practices.

Technology Withdrawal

2006-02-02T11:32:00.000-06:00

It's official, my generation is addicted to technology. From Anderson Cooper's blog:

"Ok, so I know I should blog earlier in the day, but I just got back from Washington, D.C., and due to my lack of organization, my BlackBerry wasn't charged, so I've been away from a computer all day. Needless to say, I arrived back in New York suffering from technology withdrawal. My hands were shaking, but now that they are dancing on the keyboard, the tremors have stopped."

And he's not the only one, just look at any college campus.

As Time Goes By

2006-02-02T11:08:00.000-06:00

Time spent in unemployment seems to move faster than time spent at work. It seems like ages ago that I had been hired as the long-term sub, and now I am just waiting; waiting for the call that says, "We need you here." Waiting for something to happen. Waiting until the day the new music education jobs are posted on our state government's website.

I have found new hobbies during my time off. My graduation present of a new camera has already come into great use; it is 5 megapixels and has 3x optical zoom - just what I've needed all along to enter amateur competitions. My other hobby is an offshoot of one I had been active in through college - writing. I suppose that writing a blog had never been enough for me, and now I've turned to writing fiction stories. I had been writing music throughout college and still do, however, writing in the English language shows results faster.

I've been following the news as well, reading the 9/11 Commission Report (the Executive Summary Pres. Bush read is easier and shorter to read; both are available online though), watching movies, and taking time for family.

One interesting tidbit I found in the Anderson Cooper 360 Blog was an entry by chief international correspondent Christiane Amanpour about listening to rock music in Iran. Here is an excerpt:

"One day, I head underground to listen to...a ROCK BAND!!!! The next day, I head to the mosque to hear the young hardliners wax passionate about the Islamic revolution that happened in 1979, as if it were yesterday, praising the new conservative government for taking them back to those values.Many of these kids just want to play their music. They are not political, yet they have to play their music in secret."

It always amazes me how music transcends worlds; revolutions are often formed and defined by them, memories are made stonger in our minds. There is always music.

what specialty should I pursue?

2006-01-22T18:31:00.000-06:00

I know I've talked a lot about the possibility of going into performing arts medicine at one point or another, and I'm resolved to the fact that the idea will always be in the back of my mind (PAMA rocks). Now, I know that if I do make the switch, it is definately something that would work for me.

From the University of Virginia Health System's Medical Specialty Aptitude Test:

Rank - Specialty, Score:
1 - Physical Med and Rehabilitation, 48
2 - Occupational Medicine, 47
3 - Rheumatology, 46
4 - Nephrology, 46
5 - Endocrinology, 45
6 - Infectious Disease, 45
7 - Hematology, 45
8 - Pathology, 45
9 - Nuclear Medicine, 44
10 - Neurology, 44

What I find amazing is that the test did not actually ask about specifics of a medical career, but rather character traits of your personality such as how detail oriented you were or how quickly you liked to see results of something. What I find more interesting is that the only show I watch on TV is House, MD, and he's an infectious disease specialist and nephrologist who happens to enjoy playing piano.

Very intersting.

time for a name change

2006-01-21T09:42:00.000-06:00

Well, I looked at the date of my last post, and realized it was time to take a moment and update. I officially ended my career as a "student teacher" Wednesday at 3:16 pm, and it was an interesting way to end the day. We were having third hour jazz band, and half of the band and a few other random students came into the office, blocked the door, and said en masse, "You're not leaving." That in turn left me standing there with my bags and coat looking at them blocking my exit. I then had to negotiate for ten minutes as to why it was okay for me to leave finally saying, "I gave you all of my contact info - it will be easy for you to keep track of me!" That was apparantly enough to convince them that it was okay to let me go to DMS.

Overall, the semester went well and I really enjoyed all of it. As compared to other student teachers, I think that I had a much better time than a lot of them. True, there were moments where I was bored stiff, but I think placement in a larger program would keep me from that problem.

So, I titled this entry, "time for a name change," with a specific purpose - to state why the title will be what it will be (revealed at the bottom of this entry). About a week ago, I got an e-mail from the music department chair at the university I had been attending (don't think that I'm going to slip on this anonymity thing either!!!) stating that an area middle school was looking for a long-term sub in band. I responded to the e-mail, made contact, and within eight hours was offered an interview. More specifically, offered an interview without the teachers or administrator seeing my resume or other official documents I would send in. I scheduled the interview, and went to that Thursday morning - the first morning I was done with student teaching (in other words, to the students that are reading this - I did not party).

Long story short, I got a job, albeit a temporary and part-time one, the first day after I finished my placement - within twenty-four hours. I am now a substitute teacher for this area school district, and as of March, will be a long-term sub for band. They liked how I presented myself in the interview and with my resume (still at four pages) and my portfolio. They thought I was well-qualified. I think this was a big confidence booster to me.

The interview was interesting and nothing like other interviews I have had in the past. It was more like several music teachers meeting for the first time who all knew of each other through other music teacher; it was like that becuase that was exactly what it was.

I'm excited!!!

As of that statement, the name of this blog will now change to "Life of a Substitute Teacher."

three days left

2006-01-15T18:33:00.000-06:00

Well, I looked at the calendar and realized that the end is almost near - the end of my student teaching that is. I have three days left at CHS, and by finally writing this post, I am admitting that I will miss it greatly. I have developed a greater love of the profession over the last several months than I ever envisioned I would have. I also will miss my students greatly. There are several students whom I worry about, and hope they will succeed, but I cannot say. I will give them my e-mail address so that I can keep tabs on them to make sure that they have a support network behind them.

My duties at the school have waned as well. I am teaching a few lessons here and there now, with SCT taking over more of the responsibilities again. Now that I think about it, I've been teaching almost all of the lessons since early October, and I can see why - not having anything to do is hard.

Oh, good news!!! I have an interview for a long-term sub position at an area middle school this Thursday morning. I have been at the school a couple of times in the past few years, and I know at least two of the music teachers there. The teacher that I would be subbing for will be on maternity leave for six weeks. The position, if I am hired, will be part time, and I would be able to pursue other interests on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays. Two other people know about the position and may have applied, but I am not sure if either of them did.

Overall, the next few days will be incredibly bittersweet. On one hand, I am looking forward to finally being done and not having another teacher watch and critique my every move. On the other, I have forms close bonds with colleagues and students, and I will miss them greatly. It is hard to teach a lesson and know that I will not be able to hear/see that student's next lesson to see the improvement over the course of that one week. It is hard to know that I will not be accessible to these students who have come to me for help and someone trusting to listen to them. I am seriously going to miss them, and the few times I will see them this semester will still be hard, but I am looking forward to them.

no school today

2006-01-02T08:49:00.000-06:00

So, there I was, driving on the highway to school and wondering why I saw almost no cars and no school busses. I passed the point where I usually see a bus, but noticed I was running five minutes late, so I figured that's why I didn't see any. Then, I began to wonder some more, so I took out my cell phone and discovered I had four new voice messages from last night. The first one, from 5:13 this morning was a call to tell me that the administration closed the district for today's postal/bank holiday. The other three were from my mom who already had today off for the same reason they cancelled classes today. So, I now have the chance to burn those CDs for some of my students today.

Happy New Year 2006!

2006-01-01T20:37:00.000-06:00

Well, it is officially the new year, and I have fourteen days left of student teaching, fifteen if you include the night that I'll come back for pep band. I've been looking online for jobs, and right now, there's not much as it is the middle of the school year. However, I have once again been tempted by the US Peace Corps webpage; according to their webpage, I'm actually very well qualified to join and probably teach overseas. That would be very cool.

I'm also in the middle of working on my application for my Wisconsin teaching license. Well, more like finding the application as we were given full instructions at the university but not the application itself. This is odd as they told us that they could notarize the application that day if we brought it to them.

We go back to school tomorrow morning, bright and early despite it being a postal/bank holiday. I'm pretty sure it's a day 1, but I'll find out when we get there. Of course, the last week we were in session, Monday was a day 1 as well. I get the feeling that I'll be searching around for that answer for awhile.

Well, off to do a few more chores for the night.

Peter Pan and Slane

2005-12-28T19:50:00.000-06:00

Okay, bear with me here for a moment - this is me being creative musically. I've had the week off from school, and I've ended up working on the Peter Pan ballet again, which is of course probably copyrighted from here to the moon. However, I've been playing with a section of the first act, where Peter and Wendy first meet, and I don't know why, but "Be Thou My Vision" seems to completely fit Wendy's proper nature and proper homelife (proper as in "prim and proper").

So, first off, when does the copyright on Peter Pan end?

Second, is "Be Thou My Vision" (the music only) currently in the public domain or is that still copyrighted?

So, why exactly was Rudolph's nose red? A more light-hearted blog entry.

2005-12-20T21:09:00.000-06:00

Well, concerts are over, and two more days of school this week until WINTER VACATION!!! I know there's an Easter Island, but is there a Christmas Island? If there is, I'd really like to go there right now.

It's beginning to look like winter (public school - can't say the C word - unless it's in the name of an actual place like in the paragraph above), and, just to prove how ready we all are for this wonderful event, I pose a question. I actually pose a story first, and then a question, but hey, who's counting. I had to watch the first hour band in study hall this morning and as I was wandering, I was wondering. I saw a senior reading "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" to some freshman (ironically, one of the young men may have been a drummer) and some bells jingled in my brain as I thought, "Gee, why exactly did Rudolph have a red nose?" I then proceeded to ask a practice room full of students slacking off about this question. I also discovered today that our students have wonderful imaginations as they delved into their veterinary knowledge to diagnose poor Rudolph with everything from a little cold to a disease that is much more communicable (followed by some rather lewd jokes on the students' parts about Santa, the little Mrs. and the elves - besides how many kids have seen Mommy kissing Santa Clause?). Oh those faithful that come to all! It brings new meaning to "Here Comes Santa Clause!"

Thinking about it more now, we really don't know what color Rudolph was, so there is a good chance he could be an albino reindeer - the nose and irises of the eyes would be red (it's that or he has lupus - an autoimmune disease). If Rudolph really was an albino, he'd also be photosensitive and would only be able to travel out in low-light conditions (pigments protect our skin from UV rays and sunburn). He'd also be mocked by the other reindeer for being different, and not really be allowed to play their reindeer games (oh those friendly beasts!). Granted, as an albino, just a few pigment-producing genes would be effected, so he'd still be strong, unless he stayed away in his reindeer room, tucked in his manger, sulking, then he'd have no strength or endurance training.

Our other option that I can think of is that poor little Rudolph had Lupus Erythamatosis (oh the mercy and the grace of that though!); this is an autoimmune disease similar to allergies and arthritis all wrapped up into one. Not fun stuff. If Rudolph did have Lupus Erythamatosis (sp?), he'd first have to be human as only humans get that disease. However, for the sake of this argument, we'll say reindeer can also get it. He'd have a butterfly-shaped rash (maylor - sp?) over his nose that would be red and look as if you've been outside ice-skating for several hours. Hence, the red-nose. He'd also be photosensitive and get severe headaches from high levels of light. But then he'd be really ill, and that wouldn't be as fun for a children's story. It'd be kind of sad and depressing - not the stuff of winter fairytales. In fact, that would be a rather blue winter holiday.

Of course, a really good explanation is that he got too close to the chestnuts on the open fire and acually burnt his nose. Poor Rudolph needing a burn unit! It would probably be a severe third degree burn if his nose was bright, and it'd be bright enough to power a sleigh ride full of Santa, and toys, and eight reindeer! If any kid got forgotten ever, it's probably because the holly, jolly old elf himself had to give Rudolph CPR while they were over the river and through the woods.

More on Rudolph's differential diagnosis tomorrow. I need to look through some veterinary journals!

PS: This was how we (myself and the students) managed to get through today's post-concert boredom. Tonight however, there is no concert and it is quite silent. I can tell though that lately we watched one too many episodes of House, MD.

PPS: How many winter songs were mentioned in this entry? Look closely as words in names were rearranged. There are for sure twenty-one.

they sent Him off in style

2005-12-19T22:49:00.000-06:00

Today is a day that will stay in my mind for a long time. On Friday, I found out about a family friend of ours passed on from cancer last week. On Saturday, I found out about another family friend passing on from cancer six months ago, but we just found out. On Sunday, I hid from the world, and today, Monday, I found out about CHS's top music advocate also passing on from cancer. Three cancer deaths in three days.

Got to school today with a renewed sense of energy; the last concert was tonight, and I had just graduated yesterday. I got into the band room and saw that SCT was wearing a tie and a suit, which he never wears. He let me put down my stuff and then told me about the advocate passing on. He then told me that a couple of years ago he and his friend were talking about their funerals, and SCT's friend said that when he died, he wanted SCT's band to play Hallelujah Chorus as his coffin was being wheeled from the church to send him out in style. Our students did that today, and I'd be willing to bet that there was not a dry eye in the church.

Unfortunately, I could not go to the funeral, but I instead watched a couple of high school classes with a licensed professional in the next room. I also took the eighth grade band on my own today, with a licensed professional in the next room willing to come to my aid if I needed it. The eighth graders did okay; what worked with them is when they were forced to listen to directions as I experimented with different noise levels with that group. They also focused well when there was background noise (Tchaikovsky and Copland recordings) competing against them and a swell of the orchestral sound. I managed to find a few leaders in the group who helped out too, so it made the hour more pleasant to run. I did a game with them today that would work in smaller groups. What I did was have them do a rhythm game which is fun in small groups, but I wanted to try with everyone. They were bored/frustrated after two minutes (I discovered though that the band cannot keep a steady beat as a whole). What I should have done was introduce it to them and then break them into smaller groups and have the winner from those groups compete. Then it would have worked better.

Choir concert was tonight and I am very proud of how the band performed as accompanists. They played/sang Hallelujah Chorus at the end of the concert, and it could have gone better, but seeing that they blended together as a group and got a beautiful baroque sound as a group, I was very happy. Went out with the high school choir teacher and the accompanist afterwards and I literally just got back from that.

Well, I'm getting up in about five hours. More later...

photo of the year contest

2005-12-18T13:23:00.000-06:00

For those of you who don't know, I am an amateur photographer, and I also entered our area's regional paper for the photo of the year contest. My photo made it onto the paper's website, but in the scanning process or something at their offices, the color washed itself out a lot along with some of the detail being lost as well; this is something I've seen with scanners with other photography. Also, several other photos on their site had washed out coloring also.

Don't know when they will judge it, but I'm looking forward to finding out. I hope I do well, but only time will tell.

the sign

2005-12-16T17:33:00.000-06:00

I just got back from the university portfolio exhibition a few minutes ago, and walking out of the classroom, I let out a huge sigh of relief. The grading portion of my college career is officially over!!! I got my pink bachelors of music tassle today and I even got honor's cords (cum laude)!!! As I sit here, I see my high school tassle on one side of the screen, my college tassle on the other, and the honor's cords just to my right. I wish I could bottle this feeling and just give it away to everyone, especially my students - they're good kids and they deserve to feel this way.

"The Sign" refers to the coda sign in a piece of music, which signifies the beginning of the end of the piece. I am about one month away from the last day of the semester, and I no longer have to fulfill grading requirements at the university. This is the happiest day of my life so far.

webweaving

2005-12-15T19:23:00.000-06:00

I am currently sitting at my computer doing the same exact thing that every other student teacher from my college is doing right now - webweaving their e-portfolios. My portfolio has been done for the entire semester, but I was showing it off to someone today and discovered that two links do not work. Upon further investigation, another 50% of the links are the same way. More specifically, two don't link at all and the others link to non-existant pages. This is after spending two to three hours a day for the last three weeks fixing this same problem. This has come down to up to eighteen hours a week for a month for a one credit class. I think that's a little much. Of course, I'm spending 70 hours on a sixteen credit class. Mathwise though, my one credit class should be more like a four or five credit class.

Today at school I discovered teenagers' aprehension at performing a solo for Solo and Ensemble. I spoke with several students today who were holding out on doing events who are good enough to do so. I am proud though to have convinced six students today to sign up.

Then, anyone know the approximate price for a score and parts for Semper Fidelis (Sousa) published in about 1916? SCT showed the school's copy to me today and we decided to try to price it on E-Bay, but the only music that was on there was for piano. We want to know!

Back to webweaving!

snow day

2005-12-14T14:06:00.000-06:00

It's the first snow storm of the year, and CHS actually closed!!! We were one of the last schools to call off for the afternoon of classes (9:43), and it was about an hour and a half after the other schools in our area closed for the afternoon. It was pretty ironic to see everything closed except our district. Administration says that there is a good chance we will not have school tomorrow, which would be kind of nice. Friday's the portfolio exhibition and it would be nice to have a break; today doesn't count as one as I ran around trying to cancel lessons with students who live in the country (which is all of them) and track down a fax.

It actually wasn't too bad to control the kids today after the school announced the closing, but that's probably because our classes by that point were done for the day anyway, and I wasn't needed at the middle school today (SCT was going).

That's about all, time to make a snow-man!

torn

2005-12-13T20:58:00.000-06:00

This is a hard concept to put into an educational/professional blog. I just got home from my high school's mixed band and choir concert, where they had two professional jazz musicians join the groups for the concert. I fought with certain people at college to allow me to live at home this semester and student teach. More specifically, I fought to apply for a specific placement, which was my old high school that I graduated from. Tonight, I sat in the audience of that school, as a member of the community and an advocate of their music program, and within two measures of the first piece wish that I had done more to attempt to student teach in this community. I have learned so much from SCT and need to learn so much more to be competitive in the job market, and to get my band to sound like my high school's did tonight.

That's really all I have to say.

the morning after

2005-12-13T05:55:00.000-06:00

Well, I was able to predict exactly what my body would do for this concert, the night after, and now the morning after. The concert went well enough, it was obvious that I was directing one of the hardest pieces as there were spots where it almost fell apart. Onstage, the group in general didn't have the focus that it usually had, and it made it hard; they seemed to regresst to where they were a month ago. I'm not used to that. They took all tempi about 40 beats per minute slower than they could play and then I had to fight them to get it to where they really are on the piece.

The setting just seemed too serious. When the band walked out onto stage, no one applauded, which got to me. They finally applauded for SCT when he came on, however, the audience was very quiet. I'm used to a much less serious audience that wants to have fun at a concert, not the kind that's forced to be there for their kids. Big difference. Entertain them!

Well, following my usual pattern, all that I need this morning is sleep, but that won't happen. I get this way with concerts. I'll be really nervous two weeks before hand and focus my attention on the music. From that point, nerves will wear on my for awhile until I crash and sleep. I then will not be nervous until the day of the concert, and then it will be in little waves like a roller coaster. I'll be fine until I either get to the site or step foot on stage, and then different nervousness hits me - one where I loose all focus. Then, I make it through the concert and am on a complete adrenaline rush for the next four-eight hours. Once I fall asleep or crash from the adrenaline, all I want to do is stay asleep for a day.

Gotta love nerves.

4 hours and counting...

2005-12-12T15:40:00.000-06:00

... until the downbeat of tonight's concert, and I haven't been that nervous at all. I think that it was a really good thing that CBD talked me into trying for and later conducting campus band. CBD if you are reading this, thank you!!!

The day was productive for not having lessons. Well, we still had the eighth graders, but it wasn't that bad; they are getting better and should be a lot better than they were in spring. We can recognize the music, despite the fact that there are still plenty of bad notes being played.

Fun part of the day though was standing around with the middle school choir teacher and the middle school principal (a former band teacher) and just having them tell me stories. Really good stories, and I know they will happen to me (I just smiled during this and thought of the student with the reed). I love hearing stories from people who have been in the field for longer than me - it's good learning and it's funny.

Well, need to get ready for the concert - two hours of make-up, hair, and other things should be enough!

12 hours and counting...

2005-12-12T06:23:00.000-06:00

...until I'm on the road to the concert tonight! It's the morning of the concert, and I am surprisingly calm. I woke up before my alarm and tried to fall back asleep, but it didn't happen. I'm a little nervous, but surprisingly calm. We'll see how that stays once I'm near the students; no lessons today so I probably won't be near them that long.

Finished the SOE Portfolio last night, and I am greatly relieved that it's finished. All I have to do is get SCT's signature on an old form that I didn't photocopy before I turned it, and get both SCT's and SP's signatures on the official evaluation, and then scan those into a pdf file, insert them into the portfolio, link them, and burn the CD.

I can do this this week!

Solo and Ensemble officially kicks off tomorrow!

less than 24 hours

2005-12-11T20:50:00.000-06:00

Just finished my e-portfolio for my Mued 400 class, and I am relieved. All that I have left to do is double-check links on the CD-RW and to add in the final evaluation by SCT. Now all that's left for the next 24 hours is to go through random waves of nervousness for the concert tomorrow night at 7:30. I know we're prepared, but every so often I have the thought, "What if _______ happened..." go through my head and I get jittery again. This is normal though with any concert for me.

Kind of wish I would have tried to convince SCT to let me teach something a little easier, however, I'm still up for the challenge.

Now, to find that skirt for tomorrow...

a riddle

2005-12-08T18:20:00.000-06:00

If a copy machine is left to make copies on its own, will it still make the copies? I ask this because today SCT and I made all of the programs for Monday's concert. We then bribed/begged/solicited/etc... our students to fold the programs. About eight of us together folded 500 programs in less than an hour. Our students are awesome!!!

Semester is winding down - midterm grades for this term are due in on Monday at noon, and my project for the morning is to enter grades for the high school and eighth graders; don't know yet if we enter comments for this as the last midterm scoring session was a day that I was at college for a seminar.

On a more serious note, I'm worried about a student. This student has had a really rough life, and is now in the middle of a custody battle. No one really knows what will happen or which state this student will be living in in the next 48 hours, however, the student is taking it very well. We exchanged e-mails yesterday after her lesson so that if the student is no longer in the area as of tomorrow, I can still make sure that the student isn't have too many problems, or at least be there as a positive role model. Really hope that the court/lawyers pull together for the good of the student and not for the interests of the parents involved. I kind of wish I didn't worry about my students so much, but then again, that is part of me that makes me a better teacher and makes my students more willing to approach me (they even included me in the card for this student!).

More later...

parade and formulaic writing

2005-12-04T12:39:00.000-06:00

Well, yesterday was the Christmas Parade and the high school band marched in it. It was small, only five blocks, if that, and we didn't wear uniforms. The middle school band marched in it as well, and they had uniforms that were purchased used from a high school that was purchasing new uniforms. They were so cute. Some of them thought they had to march with the high school so I was shoeing them away into their own band. When we finished the route, our busses were parked behind the middle school's busses and I got to look for our eighth graders in the line up.

Strangest parade though. The downtown has canned music playing from the cable company, so when we weren't playing, we heard music still going. Plus, the middle school band was just close enough to us that we could hear them too. We didn't use a drum major, instead SCT did whistle calls from where he marched. Most of the band was out of step, and lines were horrible. I guess though that's what to expect when you need the time to rehearse for the winter concert in five rehearsals.

Then, I noticed a connection between today's hit television shows and classical-era sonatas. Both are written to follow a formula. Now, I've noticed this before, but I've never really seriously thought about it. Sonatas have a formula that is followed by most composers, and the listener/player began to expect that formula (listen to marches and you'll hear it too). Deviation from the formula makes it interesting for the audience, while hinting at specific themes makes the audience recognize the peice easier. Such is the same with popular television today. It all follows a formula, and you expect that formula. Deviation from the formula is interesting, however, there are still inside-jokes and references that we expect from these shows as well.

Gotta love formulaic writing.

100th post!!!

2005-12-01T17:11:00.000-06:00

Wow, I've already posted to this 99 other times before today and that makes this...

...the 100th post!!!!!!!

Not that there is anything really new today. Snowed last night and I got to school shortly after SCT (needed to get coffee first, or I would have literally pulled in right after him as he was behind me for awhile), and managed to see some kid doing donuts in the parking lot. I flashed my lights at him, he stopped, and we both parked. Gave him a lecture on driving safety when he got out of his car. He then said, "Well, I only do it when there aren't many cars around." And I said, "One car is too many. Don't do it again," and left him with a warning. I took down his license plate (even though it was a temp/applied for) and am going to wait to see if he does it again or shows evidence of it.

The day was really long. The whole crunch time thing has officially gotten to me and I'm looking forward to being able to sleep on Saturday for a little while. Even though we have a parade that morning, my plans are to come home, nap for awhile, and then assemble the rest of my DPI Portfolio. I just need to scan things in. SCT is working on my semester eval and will hopefully have that done by tomorrow. I told him he didn't need to, that I could send it in the mail to everyone and then have the needed people sign it, however, but I think he might just have it done by tomorrow morning.

Tomorrow is my last eval by SP. SCT has given me the full hour to plan as I wish. I'm going to run two pieces, and then rehearse Hallelujah Chorus. SCT is also letting me play with Hymnsong of Philip Bliss, my favorite piece. I confessed to him today that I ran it once when he was in Iowa, and he didn't mind. I can't wait though. Hopefully I'll be feeling better tomorrow morning. I'm going to bed early tonight and laying off the caffeine for awhile as I think that's why I've felt rundown yesterday and today and hope that it does the trick. Halfway through rehearsing Festivo I was overcome with this and fought to make it through. I asked SCT for some advil, but he didn't have any (I already took tylenol) and neither did any of the other teachers I asked (only two). Ugh.

Well, off to do a little more score study before tomorrow morning. Need to get down the cues for Hallelujah and want to double-check Hymnsong.

two more things!!!

2005-11-29T18:56:00.000-06:00

I was just about to burn a CD when I looked down at my hand and saw a little smiley face on it. Let me explain. I had a student at DMS today who is a beginning clarinetist. She's able to get most of her notes, however, she's having a hard time remembering to roll her left hand index finger to the A key rather than pressing it down. So, I showed her how your hand rolls to the note and where the finger strikes the key. I then took out my pen and drew a mark on my hand, looked at her and said, "I bet you would like a smiley face on your hand too!" and drew the mark there for her. She was excited about having the smiley face and she was able to roll to the A key. I think this will be a lesson that will stick with her.

The other thing was that yesterday I was teaching a lesson to a student while SCT was teaching another lesson in the room next to me. He overheard me use a technique that worked and he then used it in rehearsal today! The good thing is that the student I was working with caught on right away, unfortunately, if there's a second step to the technique that SCT didn't get to overhear at all, so half the band was lost when he tried the technique today. I might have to ask him tomorrow about that.

crunch time - day 2

2005-11-29T18:06:00.000-06:00

Well, I'm adapting now to the fact that our concert is two weeks from yesterday. I ran through Festivo with the band and fixed some minor things that ended up changing how the entire group sounded. I think the rehearsal went really well, and I want to remember how that felt so that I can continue on with that the next times I direct. I'm also at a point where I have the music memorized and am actually forgetting to turn the page as I am so engrossed with the ensemble's sound. That's the mark of where I need to be in my mind.

Got some interesting news from college last night that made me a little angry with the red tape again, but I think I managed to get past it. Still a little irritated by it and how little things are continually made into something larger there, but, I should hopefully be done with that all soon and be able to teach with a license.

I'm not sure if I mentioned it in here or not, but I ended up writing a coursepack/workbook for use with teaching solos for Solo and Ensemble Festival. I've showed it to a few people and got up the courage today to show it to SCT. Great news: he's going to use it with all of his students playing a class A solo this year!!! I know I've been making an impact with the kids, but this will hopefully make even more of one, and one that they will remember for life!!! I remember talking with some other teachers and they mentioned how they feel that their classes are not remembered by students years later. However, this coursepack will allow the students to have something that they can keep as a portfolio for later. All I have to do is burn it onto a disk tonight and print it at school tomorrow for the kids! I showed it to several studetns, parents, and music store people, and they are just as excited about it as I am! I cannot wait. Solo and Ensemble Festival has always been something that I've seen as more important in my mind for the students as it is something that makes them more musically independant. Now, the coursepack will help even more.

Then, remember the story about the student with the moldy reed? The student bought a new one today and is going to come in for an extra lesson tomorrow for help on breaking it in. Another teacher of his told me how much being in band is helping this student with the rest of his life, and the student's confidence and attitude have improved greatly because of it! I cannot wait for his lesson tomorrow!

That's all for now, lots of work to do tonight! Will probably just tape House and watch it in a few weeks.

Crunch Time!!!

2005-11-28T17:48:00.000-06:00

Well, Thanksgiving is officially over, and the next break comes after the three concerts, a parade, numerous pep bands, numerous lessons, numerous ill students, Hallelujah Chorus rehearsals, portfolio presentation at college, commencement, graduation announcements, graduation party (family is insisting on those two things, I'm saying no as nicely as possible), two insurance applications, and starting solo and ensemble. This means, IT'S CRUNCH TIME!!!

Dates are as follows:
Dec 2 - final eval by my professor
Dec 3 - parade
Dec 9 - pep band
Dec 12 - HS Band concert (will be long)
Dec 13 - pep band
Dec 14 - Hallelujah Chorus full rehearsal
Dec 15 - MS Band concert (will be very long)
Dec 16 - Portfolio Presentation and Mued 398/400 Final Presentations (very high pressure)
Dec 18 - Commencement and Graduation Party
Dec 19 - HS Choir Concert (Hallelujah Chorus)
Dec 22 - pep band
Dec 23 - start of winter break.

Normally, if I wasn't following a collegiate schedule on top of the two public school schedules, I would be fine. However, as of December 18, everything changes is my life according to the US IRS definitions and I can no longer claim dependancy. I'm glad I'm finally moving on to "adulthood," however, it comes at the worst time of the year - holiday concert season. My entire family is after me about following college-traditions for commencement, but if I do so, I will not be mentally alert for anything at school. My students definately come before my family in this case, and I wish they would understand it. I'm not some kid anymore pretending to teach music, I am a teacher teaching music about to be licensed to teach. There's a difference, and none of them realize it.

Looking at my rant, I remember reading a book this summer about med-school interns, and it was actually a compilation of students' diaries assembled by their supervising professor at the medical school. Every intern in that book said something to the effect of what I said above, and they added an additional statement that I agree with: "I have changed because of experiences I have had throughout this internship, and the people in my life cannot see why. However, live my life for that period of time, and you too will change. It might not make you a better person, however, it makes you better at what you do and appreciate what you've been through even more."

And while writing that, my parents told me to get off my computer at least three times.

Festitude!!!

2005-11-21T17:23:00.000-06:00

I wasn't at school today, but, I had a good reason. The school I'm student teaching at is hosting Solo and Ensemble Festival again in Spring for the second year in a row, and I was in Waunakee at the Wisconsin Center for Music Education today for a Festival Manager's Conference. Let me back up a bit as to why I am volunteering to go back after I'm done student teaching to work at the festival and help out in every way shape and form posssible...

During college (aka, the last five years) I have volunteered at our university's State Solo and Ensemble Festival and worked in the office/headquarters each year. I started out as a lowly freshman who sorted paper into envelopes and worked up to running the headquarters for the last two to three years. Last year, I observed SCT at CHS and we started talking about Solo and Ensemble, and I agreed to volunteer to run the headquarters there and come in early that week to help with final preparations and to chaperone students. This year, I am student teaching at CHS and was allowed to go to the WSMA conference in place of SCT. I just got back and cannot wait for Solo and Ensemble to start! I already have several students working on entries for this year; plus I know the school and both music teachers' copy codes as well for this years festival.

The best thing about today is that it wasn't just about Solo and Ensemble. There were workshops as well on WSMA/WMEA/WAME Resources (Wisconsin School Music Association/Wisconsin Music Education Association/Wisconsin Association of Music Education - all at http://www.wsmamusic.org), music education advocacy, and publicity workshops. It was also a wonderful day to network and meet other people in music education in the state that were not connected with the university I attended. Also, I saw people that I did go to college with as well that I haven't seen for a couple of years.

And... Festitude!!! Our last portion of the day dealt with the attitude to approach Solo and Ensemble. Instead of using the mindset that this Festival is a requirement for WSMA member schools (which it isn't - the Concert Festival is though), think of this Festival instead as a way to provide a unique and pleasant experience to our students. Don't just throw names and numbers into the scheduling program, instead, take a look at it and make sure that the order is setup to make sure that all participating students, schools, and adjudicators have the best experiences possible.

To end with the words of a professor of mine, who is also connected with WMEA and is also a State level Festival Manager, "A happy judge means a happy student. A happy student means a happy director. Think before you say anything that would offend anyone."

what's in my iTunes...

2005-11-18T19:05:00.000-06:00

Stolen from a fellow music ed major:

Take all the songs in iTunes (or your music player of choice), alphabetize them, and tell the first song of each letter.

A - "A Change Would Do You Good," Sheryl Crow
B - "Baby," Bobby McFerrin
C - "C'Mon C'Mon," Sheryl Crow
D - "D'Une Prison," composed Reynaldo Hahn, sung Robert Peavler
E - "Early Afternoon Blues," Chick Corea & Origin
F - "Fana Kaisi Bana Kaisi," Janki Bai (Vintage Music from India)
G - "Gaian Visions," Frank Tichelli (band composer)
H - "Halleluja," Jeff Buckley
I - "I'll Be Seeing You," Jay Atwood (jazz piano)
J - "J'Ai Deaux, Amore," Madeleine Peyroux (jazz vocalist)
K - "Kamarinskaya," composed Dmitri Kabalevski, performed San Diego Chamber Orch
L - "L'Oiseau de feu - Suite (Firebird Suite)," composed Igor Stravinsky, performed Royal Concertgebouw Orch
M - "Maids of Cadiz," composed ? (don't remember), performed UWSP Jazz Ens (I'm on the recording)
N - "Nancy (With the Laughing Face)," Cannonball Adderley
O - "Occasional Overture, Op. 38," composed Benjamin Britten, performed ?
P - "Pagan Poetry," Björk
Q - "Quartet Finale," composed Leonard Bernstein, Soundtrack to Candide
R - "Radio Sweetheart," Elvis Costello
S - "Sacred Love," Sting
T - "Tadbir Se Qismat," Mohammed Hussein (Vintage Music from India)
U - "Uf dem Anger 10. Were diu werlt alle min," composed Carl Orff, from Carmina Burana
V - "V Saturn, the Bringer of Old Age," from The Planets, composed Gustav Holst, perf. London Symphony Orch
W - "Waiting for the End of the World," Elvis Costello
X - ---
Y - "YMCA," The Village People (hey, it's fun to dance to)
Z - "Zigeunerweisen, Op. 20," Best of Wiener Philharmoniker

you really should consider a new reed

2005-11-18T17:54:00.000-06:00

Wow, was today interesting. Friday, start of deer hunting, and the students are wound up. Friday, all but three students played their lessons. Friday, we did pep band music in band. But that's not what made it interesting. The lessons were very interesting.

The first interesting lesson came with a senior who was last chair in his/her section. I've been teaching this student all semester and haven't been able to figure out everything that's going on with him/her. Finally I realized that the student isn't using his/her full lung capacity, therefore running out of air and he/she stops counting at the point of taking a breath. This is the one student that is throwing off the entire band in a soli section in Festivo. Spoke with SCT about this student and he said that the student had been doing that since day one in sixth grade and he's tried everything to change the student's habits on this. The same student is showing no musical improvement as well, despite hearing the student practice in our practice rooms.

The second interesting lesson came with a student who is on an IEP for ADHD and is just being transitioned into the inclusionary setting after several years in a non-inclusionary environment. This is the second lesson this semester that the student has shown up for; the first of such where the student had everything for the lesson (music, instrument, reed, etc...). I asked the student if there were any questions when student (lets call said student Minnie Mouse as PC language is harder to type quickly) said that the instrument wasn't playing well. I told Minnie that I wanted to look at it, so I took it from her and started looking at it from the bell (rather than from the top). I figured that SCT hadn't looked at this yet, and it was Minnie's first year at the high school. There were no problems with the instrument until I got to the reed: here was this chipped gray thing where the reed should be. I asked Minnie how old the reed was, assuming that she just didn't take care of the reed, when she said that she had the reed since the beginning. I knew I didn't really want to know, but I then asked, "The beginning of this year?" Minnie replied, "No, since I started in sixth grade." A three year old, moldy, chipped reed that really needed to be quarantined by the CDC or something. I've never seen anything that bad (unfortunately, I know that this will not be the last one either). I followed through with Minnie's SpEd teacher afterwards as well as SCT who just looked at me and smiled without thankfully aknowledging that there would be plenty more reeds like that in my career (for the record, the SpEd teacher looked somewhat disgusted about the reed as well; I think she chose the safer environment to work in).

The third interesting student I allowed SCT to take as I was working on grades. Finally worked out a system that SCT and I can use to easily identify students; I re-wrote the eighth grade band list in Excel and listed instrument next to the name as well as made columns for each day of the week. It is going to be so much easier from this point on with that band; I plan on doing that for my students in the future.

Also went over the audio recording of the rehearsal from Wednesday. I realized how not being an aural learner (I'm visual-kinesthetic) is going to make my job of listening for articulations and wrong notes harder. I had listened to the recording several times but never noticed small things such as an articulation in one spot. I had noticed some things, but not as many as I would have liked to.

On a final note, high school students are messy. Eighth hour came and there were no music students left in our wing. The choir teacher came over and exclaimed how she was annoyed by how the students use our department as their "closet." So, she and SCT gathered all of the personal belongings scattered around the departement and hid them in the band room (this was while I was picking up after the low brass and percussion from the last two days - SCT cleaned at parent-teacher conferences and the room was immaculate, I wanted it to look the same). I looked in the corner by the marimba and saw a stack of sweatshirts, so I grabbed them and joined SCT and the choir teacher (VMT) in hiding clothing. Then, SCT and I proceeded to clean out the band lockers of personal belongings (I never would have survived being SCT's student - my band locker held everything of mine).

Well, on to the weekend. I now have three more stories to share with the family...

a challenge I'm up for

2005-11-17T17:08:00.000-06:00

Had an interesting lesson today. Third hour I ended up teaching five lessons within a 46 minute period, which waiting for students made the lessons about seven minutes each. I was teaching a drumset lesson, when the student said, "Hey, ya know, YOU play it!" This student is a really good percussionist and passed my ability level about two years ago on snare and drumset (I'm still better at mallets and the other drums than she is).

I told her, "You have the advantage right now seeing that I've never played your part, however, I can help you still."

My student replied, "No, YOU should play it."

I proceeded to sit down and play her part the way it is supposed to be played. I then told her how to get better at the lesson and then said that I had things at home that will help her (which I do). So, I'm going to burn her a CD or two of some good jazz percussionists (gotta love Elvin Jones) and photocopy an article from the newest Jazz Education Journal that will help her a lot.

I feel bad though; she is at a level where she needs to be studying with someone whose main instrument is percussion. I don't know if it is my place though to tell SCT that I think the student needs a professional to study with. If I was the main band director at the school, and not a student teacher, I would have her in private lessons in a flash. However, I am just a "student" and therefore still feel that I am stigmatized by the label, a label my students are very well aware of and still take advantage of at times. Most of them still see me as an authority figure except this percussionist, who I know I will have to win over with talent rather than anything else.

Hopefully the CD and article will help her; if there was more time in the day, I'd just show her these things instead.

snow days

2005-11-16T19:14:00.000-06:00

Well, Winter has officially kicked off in Wisconsin - the highway I take to school is "ice covered and hazardous" according to the state DOT/State Patrol. However, this officially confirms the belief in the students' minds that it is definately a good time to be inside and learning. Students today just wanted to linger in lessons and band, which slowed down the pace to one I like better. Plus, students just wanted to listen to an adult talk today, which is a nice change of pace.

One thing I did think of was how to approach a person playing a solo part that needs to be double checked. Many directors would call on the student and have them play that part in front of everyone with us being directly across the room from each other. That's easy for us directors as it saves time and we're used to doing that ourselves from our college days. However, this is highly unnerving for our students who are often just trying to hide behind their instruments. I realized that it is much better for the teacher to stop rehearsal for a moment, walk over to the student, stand next to the student, and have the student play the part. That way, most of the band will start talking amongst themselves and less attention is on the single player who needs help with his/her part. Then, the student is less inclined to make mistakes knowing the entire band is listening/watching. It's so much easier; yes, you lose control of the class momentarily, however, if you are working with just one student, do you really need control of the other sixty at that exact moment?

going along

2005-11-15T16:19:00.000-06:00

Well, the semester is going along, and we are just at the start of cold and flu season. Half of my students at school today canceled lessons due to sore throats, and my after school students at DMS did the same, so I got to come home early. I honestly don't blame them for being ill and wanting to rest; I feel the exact same way.

It is harder and harder for me to find new little discoveries each day while I am student teaching. I have been at the school for over two months now and feel as if I've been there for years. I'm developing more of my own style now (well, become comfortable with it) and am using more visual-aids while teaching. I still need to work on my list of catch-phrases to be remembered by (all teachers have them). SP observes me again in one week and I have made special arrangements with him and SCT to teach lessons that day. I'm looking forward to it - there are several students coming in for lessons that are not on our regular schedule for that day, so there will be a diverse group of instruments (including one composition student).

I'm getting back into composition too. With having been ill, I don't have the full lung capacity for flute or other instruments, so I've ended up playing piano a lot and have picked up where I left off for the Peter Pan ballet thing I was working on. It's tough though balancing teaching and composing throughout the day. I have periods of twenty minutes or so where I can work on other things, and then the bell rings and I have students again. The trick is balancing the teaching/organized thoughts with the composing/creative thoughts. I looked at a note this morning from CBD that mentioned those two things in it, and that's the challenge I'm seeing now.

Off to composing...

hymnsong

2005-11-10T16:55:00.000-06:00

Today went well, and I'm starting to feel better. I did the first hour rehearsal with my style of teaching and actually interacted with the students more. I asked them questions! They answered! SCT has been trying to get me to just rehearse the music, but my style is to also explain what is happening. I started with Festivo; once the students knew that the first and last sections of the piece were the same, just orchestrated differently, they did a much better job. I also worked them harder than normal, and they kept up with me. It seems that when I am not as intimidated by a teacher in the room, I do better. After that, I decided to run Hymnsong of Philip Bliss. Wow!!! I told them about the meaning that piece has to me and told them about their connection to the piece to me via college. I told them that I would interpret the music differently than SCT would so they needed to watch me. I conducted it and I almost cried while doing so - they played it so sensitively and kept up with my changes. At the end, they did not make a sound. While I had my hands up from conducting I told them a final word and then let them pack up early - they did so well today that they deserved it. Later, several students told me that they liked that I conducted it differently than they were used to. I didn't ask which interpretation they liked better. I think I'll ask SCT if he'll let me conduct that piece as well as Festivo; otherwise I'm only conducting one of nine pieces for the concert (one of six for the concert band, none for the jazz band).

Lessons went well today, the students are all doing a good job.

One interesting thing though was the fact that the high school did its final dress rehearsal for Grease this afternoon in the auditorium. This was interesting. I ended up watching a bunch of students that were in the musical and watching the bandroom to prevent sound from leaking into the auditorium. We lost access to the practice rooms as those were changing rooms for the boys, so none of the students could practice. To prevent loud sounds from the students in my room, I ended up dimming the lights a bit and closing all but one door to the room. This actually helped a lot; it is a trick I picked up in ed psych last semester in our brain-based learning unit. We change our behavior based on the setting, and if you walk into a quiet room with dimmed lights, your behavior quiets. I did this technique with the eighth graders yesterday as well and it helped a bit, even though they were mentally spent from the testing.

Another problem with the musical was that the high school PA and bells were still active during this time, as well as students passing between classes. I ended up monitoring the hallways around the auditorium to keep students quiet and prevent that sound from leaking into the hall. Also, there wer only about three lessons during this time so I got a chance to watch parts of it. I tried to sneak in and literally almost ran into the director running out, so it was good I had opened the door for her. Instead, I ended up watching a bit from backstage in the scene shop to discover that you couldn't hear a thing. It was good they had it over the closed-circuit television system in the school (the cue to this info was the announcement to turn off the television monitors in the building right before the musical feed was started).

The students did really well, but there were some problems with the sound equipment that was fortunately resolved by the second act. It was rather fun to watch my students running around in costume and take part in this, even if it was a high school musical (FYI - the last musical I saw was Les Miserables on Broadway my senior year of high school, and then Blast II at Weidner).

Well, to college tomorrow for the second meeting of our portfolio class.

better not procrastinate

2005-11-09T16:51:00.000-06:00

Yesterday and today would have gone better had I not been ill and SCT going out of state for the week (I'm with a sub). So, I'm with teachers who are giving me a lot of advice and helping me out a lot, however, I'm responsible for everything when I have been told by my doctor to not even bother being there. I can't cancel rehearsals though, and the students need their lessons. It's too important that I show up.

I'm discovering the art of how to phrase questions to prevent outbursts. Case in point: the schools are doing WKCE testing this week and I addressed the eighth grade band (while yelling with both laryngitis and tonsillitis) as such:

Me: So, how is the testing going?
Students: (enter cacaphony of noise)

I managed to get them under control quickly, but it was tough. They weren't as responsible as they had been last time I directed them - maybe I took that for granted. I told them about some of my limits and expectations as well, but I needed to keep reminding them.

Me: When my arms are up I expect you to be quiet and ready to play.
Students: (randomly talking to each other)

I tried several times and they're starting to get the hang of it. If I directed them every rehearsal, they would have this nailed by now (FYI - my middle school band teacher had us very well trained at this). They are at least a lot better about responding quicker to me and to SCT, however, I could tell they were mentally spent due to the testing and just wanted to relax for awhile. We played, and rehearsed a little. I tried to rehearse the percussion - big mistake. That was a mass chaotic sound and six students taking completely different tempi and different starting points. I'll have to get SCT to let me take their sectional next week.

If I feel like this tomorrow though, I'm calling in sick.

practice

2005-11-07T17:56:00.000-06:00

So, I need to rant for a moment about students and practicing - more specifically, two of my private students who don't practice and are known to not practice. I am teaching voice to two high school students who have a lot of potential providing they practice. Here's the thing though: they have shown absolutely no improvement since they started with me in June. Why have they shown no improvement? They Haven't PRACTICED. The other thing is they keep showing up for lessons on their death bed and I know it's because their father is a heavy smoker (the two students are siblings). They are also both taking voice lessons at the LAA, which means they SHOULD be practicing something. I am sick of wasting my time with them and wasting their mother's money who said to me today, "I know you always have a reason behind your lesson plans..." as I attempted to explain to her YET AGAIN why her kids didn't do what they were assigned to do. The other teacher that they take from has given up on getting them to practice, and I am too. We've both asked the mother, and practicing is not enforced. I don't even know if these kids want to be in lessons. I do know that they are being pushed - by their parents - into doing this to improve, however, improvement begins at home. In theory, you shouldn't need to take music lessons if you practice; it's just nice to have a teacher double check what you are doing.

End rant.

two sites

2005-11-06T10:44:00.000-06:00

Here are two interesting sites I found just now:

http://teachers.net/ - A site for teachers of any experience/age. There are several forums, including student teaching, where teachers can talk to each other about professional development, and just getting help.

http://teachfirstamendment.org/ - An advertiser on Teachers.Net; it is about how to teach the first amendment in the classroom. Included is a quiz on the first amendment.

short day, grades, and a cool link

2005-11-04T18:22:00.000-06:00

Well, we had a shortened day, which meant that the high schoolers were acting up. SCT took the rehearsal this morning and did pep band music. I taught several lessons, and then the day was over.

Grades. Today was the official end of the first quarter, and the half-way mark in my student teaching. Next Friday I get my letter of pending licensure, which means I can officially start applying for jobs if I find one. We had three classes total, about 120 students, to assign grades and comments to digitally. It took about three hours; this is because the computer system was slow and every other teacher in the district was working on the exact same thing. The actual time to enter grades took about half an hour; the rest of the time was spent waiting for the computer to load the webpage of the program. I am so glad that we have kept on top of our grading system, otherwise I might still be there right now.

Found a cool site for anyone who is into 20th Century American history and the Civil Rights Movement: Heroes of the Civil Rights Movement at The Smoking Gun. Rosa Parks' photo is number 35 in the slide show; I haven't found Martin Luther King Jr.'s yet, but it's in there. The slide show features 100 photos of the Civil Rights era (Bus Boycotts and the Freedom Riders) found in the basement of a Montgomery County Sheriff's Department. The Rosa Parks picture is one that has been used by the media these last couple of weeks. Trivia Tidbit: Rosa Parks' booking ID was 7053 and Martin Luther King Jr.'s ID was 7089. It's amazing to see the looks in the eyes of these leaders; some show shame, others show determination. Rosa Parks has a look in her eyes that shows that she will win.

On to find more educational time-wasters...

what I love about music

2005-11-03T17:46:00.000-06:00

Well, today was interesting, to say the least. It was one of those days where I woke up and everything just went wrong from there (well, for three hours or so). Everything just kept cascading downwards and was topped of by the fire alarm going off. I'm one of those people who keep saying, "Okay, things will get better from here," but right as I said that to myself, another thing went wrong. I didn't want to admit how horrible the day was going, cause that's a personal thing, but finally I had to tell SCT. He thankfully knew exactly what to say to make it better and the day started to improve. Taught some lessons after that point and several of my students were having similar days, so we laughed it out together as well. Best part of laughing it out together led to a spontaneous drum circle with about ten students, myself, and SCT just jamming. That's what I love about music.

Then, I discovered that I can still plunk out some notes on acoustic bass with my hand being bad (FYI - my way of getting over things is to work it out on any available instrument). So, after finding out if the strings were still good on the bass (still questioning this - they didn't snap on me) and finding out if it was in tune (G string is a little flat, but I don't want to break the string tuning it as it is large and would be close to my eyes), I played during every free moment I had and it was the most freeing feeling I have had in a long time. I love that too about music - the way it can instantly change something for the better.

Driving back tonight was another thing about music - I was behind SCT on the road, and looked in my rear-view mirror to discover one of my students. She was waving and honking to get my attention. Finally she passed me and I kept up to her for several miles until she turned off to go home (gotta love a rural school district). As she was about to turn, she waved again. She was also one of the students having a bad day.

Overall, it all worked out for the better. SCT gave me good advice when I told him how my day had been going and how I couldn't work over it - he told me to remember that there are far worse things in life and things could always be worse. Also, I'm going to take his wife's advice she passed onto me too - keep a folder of things that are really good, such as letters and pictures, and look at it when times are tough.

rehearsal and other things

2005-11-02T18:03:00.000-06:00

Just got back from today. It went really well; I just have to keep my injured hand away from instruments (and apparantly computers too).

Band went well - I conducted Festivo again, and used a lighter beat pattern which made a world of difference with everyone. There are still a few spots where I am cuing the wrong person, but that should change soon. SCT told be to be "meaner" to the group as I am quite laid back and relaxed on the podium. It worked. Rehearsal went better and SCT answered more questions for me as well about the piece. Ironic thing is that the tempi that he likes for it is what I've been trying to do, however, the group/beat pattern has been dragging.

Lessons at school went well - I'm getting to know the method books better there. I realized tonight while teaching lessons at DMS that I am teaching about 120 students a week, with the group representing seven different schools, with four school systems thrown into the mix. No wonder I am getting confused at times - I need to keep track of all of the happenings in these districts to know what is going on. Snow days will be fun as I cancel a student's lesson at DMS if school has been canceled due to snow; and CHS never closes its doors.

Started two new students tonight. I got all the wrong impressions from the parents, but the two (brother and sister) are such good kids. All of my students are generally wonderful.

Well, being called to the other room, plus it's hard to type with a taped hand.

a long and humbling day

2005-11-01T17:15:00.000-06:00

My day was divided into two parts: the part where I felt like a high school student, and the part where I realized I really wanted to play any instrument. The former is because my high school geometry/pre-calculus teacher walked into my bandroom today while I was teaching a lesson. I knew that he was in the school subbing, I just didn't know when he would be there. We got to talk a little bit about old times (I don't like that phrase, but I don't know what else to use) and I felt both old and extremely young at the same time. It was a very humbling experience. I ended up spending the rest of the morning talking with anyone and everyone and even got some stories out of SCT.

The long part of the day came after most of the students left the bandroom. It was very quiet and SCT likes to wander during the day. Plus, we're seeing the firsthand effects of No Child Left Behind; our eighth grade band is in the middle of state testing for that, so we are barely meeting at all this week. We're getting some lessons in, but that's it. Our schedule is so messed up between the two schools that I don't know how it would work if there was just one of us. SCT took the eighth graders while I took the lessons at the high school.

Another part of what made it long today was that lessons went well, and nothing really has to get done at this point. We will have to fit concert uniforms, but that's it for the pressing work outside of lessons.

Then, I didn't realize how much of the day I actually spend with an instrument in my hand. I am either teaching with one or am playing one to pass the time, or am playing piano to work on score study (a never-ending process). The day goes even longer when you are limited by an injury. It was one thing in college - I had other homework to pass the time. But today, I had nothing. I'm to the point of just turning on CNN or something after the lessons are done, but then that destroys the few opportunities for quiet within that room. I can't really use a computer easily, and I shouldn't even be doing this. So that really only leaves books, so I guess I'll have to go digging through boxes tonight. I'd write out some short stories since I have the time, but I can't hold a pencil easily.

One thing I have discovered is that I am a better conductor when I have a mamed hand. I can't grip the baton properly, so I can't have a death-grip on it and I can't tense up. So I'm left with being simple with my conducting pattern. SCT had me conduct for him eighth hour and he noticed this happening. I also was able to clear up some questions I had about the music as well.

Off to find some books...

technology

2005-11-01T05:07:00.000-06:00

I got an e-mail from one of my professors the other day that I just disregarded; the professor thought that I had an elementary placement for student teaching, and not secondary. Then, this morning, I went to double-check AGAIN that the paperwork I filled out to correct the problem in my registration went through correctly, even though I've checked this before and it was correct (call it a 5 am rude awakening). Well, the Registration and Records server is down, so I can't check. And, until I know, I will probably be slightly panicked.

I don't like technology, especially when it doesn't work.

can't sleep again

2005-10-31T21:10:00.000-06:00

I am a follower of the nightly news, especially when I'm limited on computer and instrument playing. More specifically, I am a follower of CNN prime time, especially Anderson Cooper. Imagine my surprise when I tuned in and Wolf Blitzer was working the 6 pm (CDT) time slot. This was after Lou Dobbs' usual 5 pm and right before Paula Zahn's 7 pm. Then, I remembered that AC had been cohosting with Aaron Brown. I decided to go and watch and who was hosting NewsNight with Aaron Brown? Paula Zahn. So, I decided to google this a bit and found this. Apparantly, CNN is changing its primetime shows around. Now, I might have to stay up late to watch Anderson Cooper.

Of course, this change could be because of the fact that AC is writing a book (and may I say I've been following him since before the Tsunami last year?).

weekend warriors

2005-10-31T16:09:00.000-06:00

Well, we returned from break today, and it was definately a needed one at that! Everyone returned in better moods, both from relaxing for four days and the shift in the time. I have to say though, how thrown off my intuition is with the time change. I keep telling myself it's a different time than it really is, plus, I still have to reset half the clocks I use.

Rehearsals went well today, however, our lead alto in jazz band played hookie, so I had to sight-read his parts. Not a big deal, except that I banged up my hand while boating this weekend.

Got to give the progress report to SCT today about Wednesday; he too was in shock over the behavior of the eighth graders. I noticed in their lesson though how much they adore him and me; one of them even told me how much more he enjoyed band this year than last year. That's good.

So about the hand. All the way through college I have suffered many injuries from my art. No big deal really as we all have, but there have been too many times (eg: every time) where I was injured and said, "No big deal, it's just a little injury," and then kept on playing until I had developed full-blown tendonitis. Well, I've learned from my ways. My "little bruise" on my hand from the boat is worse than I thought, but not as bad as I feared. I just can't play instruments for about two weeks, and I really shouldn't be typing either.

With that, expect really short reports for awhile.

internship pay

2005-10-30T21:12:00.000-06:00

I'm discovering that most people seem to assume that students get paid to attend an internship program of some sort. The fact of the matter is that most internships no longer pay, or are being turned into a different sort of program. In teaching, it is difficult to get an internship, and often discouraged as well.

I've had to explain to about twenty separate people this semester that I am not getting paid and why I am not getting paid. Student teaching is a voluntary thing; well, I have to go through it, but it is a college class that I am enrolled in and I will recieve a grade at the end of the semester. Why is it difficult for most people to understand this?

on composing and other dreams

2005-10-30T19:11:00.000-06:00

Dedicated to my parents, who pushed me in ways they didn't forsee possible...

As a little girl, my parents would take me to the symphony. It wasn't much; instead it was the Milwaukee Symphony Orchestra dress rehearsals at Ripon College, and as a small child, I would usually sleep through them. I remember one evening in particular where we were leaving the concert and I said to my parents, "One day, I want to play flute in an orchestra." My mother looked at me and said, "You won't make any money." Twenty years later and I've fulfilled that goal - my parents need to learn not to push me that way.

Then, at another point in my life, I remember wanting to conduct a band. I would stand in my room at night listening to the music from The Lion King and use a pencil to conduct. I did that every night for about two years straight and then moved on to other pursuits, which will be named later. Maybe this is where I got my bad habit of mirroring while I conduct different bands, although, it's getting better; I only mirror when I don't think the musicians on my left can see my beat pattern. Of course, that can be fixed to.

In seventh grade, my parents bought a computer with a small program on it called MIDI Orchestrator, a MIDI sequencing program with sixteen channels (two of which were for percussion). I writing out music by hand for the longest time before this, and then one day, my dad went to a music store and bought MIDI cords for my keyboard. I loved MIDI Orchstrator until I saw a demonstration at school for Finale. My life would be changed for a long time. I wanted to write in Finale - a year later I had the newest version of Finale Allegro for Windows and I now have Finale 2006 on this computer.

At another point in my life, I saw The Nutcracker. Although I slept through it (I was three), I still remember seeing the set, the dancers, and the orchestra from the third row of the theater. I guess I met the dancers afterwards, but that part I don't remember. I do remember wanting to write the music to a ballet. Today, one of my favorite composers is Tchaikovsky (and due to transliteration, that's a correct spelling). Today, I am also done with rough sketches for a ballet based on Peter Pan.

Looking back over my college career, I've succeeded in fulfilling my musical dreams, and now I need to create more. I've been pondering the use of Orff Schulwerk on the marching field for about three years now, and intend to attempt it sometime in my career - it will make a far more creative half-time show. I've also been pondering how I can find time for CMP in my classroom. I know that I want to follow the national standards too.

Of course, right now, with the promise of probably eight months of unemployment, a lot of composing and lesson plan writing will happen. I've always wanted to combine my loves of teaching and composing together, but have struggled with the balance of time between the two (somehow, pulling an all nighter the night before teaching for nine to twelve hours is just not appealing). As a quick easy fix to this lack of extreme amounts of time spent with Finale I have jumped over to writing short stories. It works to some degree, but I just can't sit back and listen to the computer play it back the way I can with music. I've delved into photography, which is somewhat more rewarding, but with a cheap camera, the picture quality is somewhat lacking. Maybe someday I'll figure out the balance between these dreams just as one day I'll own a better camera. It all happens with time, and if it weren't for the fact I am going to sleep within the next hour, I would be composing right now (unless writing in English to a blog counts for something along those lines).

happenings

2005-10-28T08:29:00.000-05:00

Well, the last couple of days went well. I didn't update on Tuesday because I was busy studying about eight scores for the next day.

Tuesday was interesting. SCT videotaped the first hour rehearsal, and I've been watching the tape and taking notes. There are so many fundamental conducting things that I need to work on again as I've developed some bad habits since finishing conducting classes at college. It seems that I have reverted to the bad habit of forcing my arm out further in front of me than it should be as well as moving my elbow a lot (thanks go out to our high school choir teacher for noticing that last one). Here, I had always been concerned about the ictus (the point where the bounce of the beat happens in the conducting pattern) getting lost. Well, the ictus is there, it is just hidden within the elbow and extended arm problems.

There are also times that I see I am not concise enough. However, there is an underlying problem to that: I need to wait for everyone to stop playing before I start speaking, and in order to do that, I need to give a cut-off that is more clear.

So, on Wednesday, I tried some of the things that I noticed in the first videotape. Now, lets add in a few more challenges: SCT had a sub who is one of the favorite teachers from the middle school who had been layed off in the reorganization of the district; day before vacation; students tried to push me to bend rules, A LOT. I videotaped this rehearsal as well, and I am afraid to watch the tape. I wanted to lighten up the group with humor, which may have been a mistake, because as soon as I cracked the first joke, half the clarinet section couldn't stop laughing and that just spiraled down from there. I tried to teach the music using affectual phrases and gestures as I had been taught to do, but the students weren't used to this, so that caused more problems. Finally at the end of the class, the sub reassured me that the problems were just from the fact that it was the day before vacation. SCT had actually wished me luck about that point the day before, and I thought that the high school students would do a lot better than that.

Jazz band was better, as I had finally learned some things. First, I have no clue as to how to work a digital camcorder, or even how to plug it in. I tried to videotape it, but I was completely lost. Then, the lead alto and tenor saxophone players were missing, which meant that the other three saxophonists were constantly getting lost. We ran some of the more simple charts and I fixed some problems with the rhythm section here and there. Then, the saxophones were REALLY lost. I ended up straping my saxophone on and just playing lead alto with the group from up front. This is a lot easier than it sounds considering that I was trying to conduct at the same time and that the rhythm section was not watching me at all.

By the end of third hour I was feeling horrible about being a teacher, and still am wondering about being a high school teacher based on those two rehearsals and the video from the day before (Festivo is a terribly difficult piece to conduct). I did talk to SCT the day before about when he first started teaching. The problems that I have been having have been due to the fact that everything I've been forced into has been completely unfamiliar to me. The high school method book is one that is hard to decifer unless you've used it for twenty or more years. The jazz music is some that I've never heard, despite being a jazz studies major (rock music in a jazz band? The university music department chair forwarned us of this practice among school teachers). And the piece I've been assigned to conduct is one that I'm realizing more and more that I ABSOLUTELY HATE. I've played it twice before I guess, and really don't remember it other than there were many parts in it that were boring, and the composer's name just doesn't stay in my mind other than the fact it sounds like a good name for a pet (Nelhybel). My not liking/understanding the piece is not helping my students to like/understand it either.

Now take that frustration and contempt, and it's time to get ready for an eighth grade band rehearsal. The sub and I drove over (at this point, I'm really liking this idea of the sub being here as he is helping me feel better about everything wrong that I've done) as I ran over on lessons the hour before (many thanks to the flute player that reminds me of me as a high school freshman for that lack of time management). We get there, and we walk in. We are greated at the door by the middle school principal who is joking with the sub that she wants to see him direct the band. He says that it's my job and not his, he's just going to take attendance as he knows the students from the previous year (he even guessed the correct instrument for most them earlier in the day - especially the percussionists). I walk in and am greated by many students saying, "Yay, Ms. _______ is here!!! Yay, Ms. ____________ is going to direct us!!!" The sub and I started the class, and then I took the podium. This group is the one that taught me to distract the percussion section by giving them little tasks. Today, I chose for them to write out the part assignments and to follow it. Warm-up was a breeze, even though I was expecting to do more with the playing. I had them play a simple scale, and I was enveloped by this warm sound. I then asked them if they remembered the last time I conducted. I then asked them if they realized how much they had matured in the last two months. They didn't realize it. I then told them how proud I was of how they had matured so much and they were just beaming with pride. There has been such a change in their musicianship since September 1st and their behavior as well. They have become such an awesome group of kids, and I want to continue to work with kids like that. I conducted the piece SCT asked me to work on, and it went well. Other than percussion, there wasn't much I could do with it. They then asked for the other piece, and it went even better. There were a couple of spots that needed to be rehearsed and worked on, but the group did pretty good at them. I then got the opportunity to work on sound and balance. I taught them to have a richer sound on the second piece, and they tried it again and it was so warm that it was like being enveloped by the warmest blanket of sound (but not too warm as that would be bad).

ECT then took the rehearsal as she wanted to work on the music for the winter parade - the sub and I sat back and watched. Everything changed at that point. Old behaviors were renewed, as were old sounds and they sounded again like they did in early September. I was in disbelief; they were a completely different group for ECT as they were for me - it was a shock. Then, ECT had to talk to a parent, so I took the podium again. They instantly bounced back to what they were for me. It was a day and night difference. When ECT came back, the kids realized that I was going to stay in the room for the remainder of the hour so they settled down. I noticed percussion had been sitting/wandering (an old problem SCT and I had with them), so I walked over to them and asked them to stand up and they did (well, one joked around but I got him to stand up).

I'd like to think that the eighth graders were well behaved for me becuase SCT told them I would be in charge on Wednesday. However, everything just seemed right about that rehearsal. The more time I spend with that age group, the more I want to teach that age. They are so much more receptive to trying musical things than the high school is. I don't know why though, even though I'd like to figure that out so that I can try it with the high schoolers.

All of this meanless rambling leads up to another topic however: a possible job. I went on the job bulletin this morning and saw a listing for a band job grades 4 to 8. I went to the website: I want that job, even though it's part time and I'd have to look for supplemental income. The school district is a smaller one setup within an urban school, and the oldest students in the district are the eighth graders. I visited the website and liked what I saw, except the music portions haven't been updated since the 2002-2003 school year. So, I'm going to give a call to some of the music stores down there and see what is going on with the school and the band program (the website listed it as grades 5-8, but the job announcement listed grades 4-8). There were a couple of other jobs as well that looked promising, but they were both long-term sub positions that needed to be filled immediately. Thankfully, the Chippewa Falls job had been pulled from the listing; I can't even imagine being the teacher who has to take over after the bus accident.

Well, time to get ready - it's the "Un-Convention" in Appleton today, and it's going to be a blast. I get to spend time with the DMS people!

jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle eighth grade horns...

2005-10-24T18:58:00.000-05:00

Well, another full and rewarding day. SCT is still giving me more responsibility, which is wonderful, and I am teaching many lessons now on my own. I still leave the tuba, trumpet, and percussion lessons to him though (which is only students). I am usually trying to get to the saxophone and flute lessons first, and usually win on that race.

I'm feeling comfortable with classroom management, but I want to find better ways to get the group's attention at the beginning of rehearsal. SCT has them trained to "Quiet please," and it works, but I want to know other ways so that I don't sound like a broken record. I guess that goes back to music ed 324 when we discussed the many ways to ask a student the same question. Of course, the single-phrase training method is a lot easier, and the students know what to expect and how to react. I really wonder which one is best.

Tomorrow will be intersting. SCT is videotaping me so I can see what I'm doing good and what I need to improve (being concise). I'm more concise in teaching lessons now, however, when I'm hearing 63 separate people playing at the same time, it's a lot harder and half the time I don't really know what to say other than, "Hit the practice rooms people!" The kids are making the most mistakes on simple, sixth grade beginner things that they should know by now. They do well on the hard challenging things though. Go figure.

Everyone around me is getting sick again. My private studio met today at DMS, and one kid's mom called me late last night to cancel. Meanwhile, my other two students showed up just as ill as the one who stayed home. So, today's topic for all lessons, seeing that none of them could sing or function, was a discussion about Musician's Health.

As the semester rolls on, it is harder to find things new discoveries to discuss here in this blog. I know that there are things I am observing, but I'm more at the point of accepting them as normal than questioning them. SCT is a good teacher and motivator. There's a lot I'm learning from him.

Oh, eighth graders. They really like SCT, but don't know me. SCT first taught them how to play their instruments before sixth grade, so they see him as that same teacher. Last time I conducted them, SCT was gone, and I heard five minutes of, "Where's SCT? We miss SCT? Why isn't SCT here?" Now, I have them on Wednesday with a sub as well, so I asked SCT to forwarn them that he wouldn't be there. He asked me why I was asking, then told me I should be able to handle them, so I told him how much they missed him, respected him, and trusted his knowledge. He was in shock and agreed to forwarn the kids that he wouldn't be there on Wednesday. So, that will help with behavior. The thing that I'm worried about most is that ECT is taking half of the rehearsal on that day to run through the music for the Christmas Parade. Will SCT and I end up having to fix old habits again? We just got them to sit back down in their seats after putting instruments away.

Only time will tell.

three days

2005-10-23T12:53:00.000-05:00

Well, I slacked off a bit, well not really slacking as I was busy doing other things. Here's how the last three days went:

Wednesday -

Directed again first hour. Went okay. Tried to fix a section with the flutes that wasn't working, and apparantly my brain wasn't working either. I just couldn't figure out how to get them to play together or how to COUNT. The second flutes were playing all whole and half notes - easy rhythms to count but they're in counterpoint to the first flutes, who alternate with them rhythmically. It's not getting easier. However, SCT showed me a different way to hold the baton which is a lot easier than the death grip that I've had for the last couple of months. Less effort to move my arm, more control on the stick.

Jazz band third hour. Went well, still just playing saxophone.

Sixth hour - Observed ECT. She's a good teacher and she is fitting the environment of the middle school. The general environment there is that everyone is welcomed and that there is no competition. Unfortunately, it was obvious that the students were ready for competition and not getting a chance to compete. ECT was doing a good job at trying to keep control of the group, however, every student was competing with her for the same control. I also noticed a lack of accountability in the general school setting. If a student doesn't follow through on responsibility, he/she isn't held accountable for it. The setting in general (and I've seen this at all middle schools) forces students to compete with each other for control. The main problems with our eighth graders and freshmen are direct carry-overs from negative middle school behaviors being reinforced as positive. It needs to change.

Thursday - Early Release.

Surprisingly, all of the students in our ensembles were in really good behavior. Usually early release and/or day before vacation means that students turn off their thinking caps. Today was different. Most students seemed to forget that it was an early release day.

Friday

Taking more responsibility. Realizing that SCT wandering around school along with leaving me with a substitute next Wednesday means that I'm getting closer to where I should be. Incredible headache though - school was the last place I wanted to be, but couldn't get out as I was still able to function somewhat.

Directed again first hour. Fixed problem with flutes by playing with each part independantly and then putting it all together again. Felt sorry for other students who had to sit and watch. Felt sorry for SCT who kept running back in the percussion section from the bells to the tenor drum. I managed to keep the reheasal going better, but am still not being concise enough. SCT came back later on with the idea to videotape rehearsals, and I completely agreed with him. He tried to sugar coat it and say that it wasn't just me, but he didn't have to. If I can see myself doing something, then I know that I will be able to fix it easier. It worked in mued and conducting at college.

Ran four lessons third hour. Two were scheduled, two were people asking for additional help. I like to push students to do what they can do, but several of them this hour are able to do A LOT. So, my pushing the students has come back to push me. Nice.

Observed our theater teacher as well, second hour. She teaches similar to CBD, so it was like being in conducting class again. Was reminded that performers perform best when faced with the concept of being vulnerable.

Worked again on GradeBook for two hours. It is a lot easier just to keep a paper gradebook and submit grades once in a while than to constantly have to check and change an electronic version that barely works. We even had an expert from the company on-site that day and they were having problems with it.

Made some real breakthroughs on lessons. One flute player was having problems with high notes. Natural inclination would be to tell the student to take a larger breath. Wasn't working for her. Instead, applied knowledge of Alexander Technique and made her aware of her facial muscles. Here, she was flexing her muscles in her face and shoulders when she went to play high notes. Fixed that and the notes came out beautifully without problems. Student said it was easier to play also.

Overall, things went well, a little tough during rehearsals, but I'm hoping that being videotaped will help. This Wednesday will be interesting as there will be a sub, but he wouldn't take a vacation day if he didn't feel I wasn't ready. It will be interesting.

Wilma hits Category 5

2005-10-19T06:07:00.000-05:00

Not again.

http://www.cnn.com/2005/WEATHER/10/19/wilma/index.html

http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2005/hurricanes/

in the swing of things

2005-10-18T19:09:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm finally used to the schedule for student teaching. Instead of coming home and sleeping right away, I am able to stay up past 10 pm again. Plus, when I get home I find that I am completely energized and ready for more socialization, which is good. I'm also getting more responsibility at school. SCT is going to be gone one day next week, and I'll be in charge of three rehearsals and probably 20 lessons. I'm looking forward to it. I am a bit nervous about it, and I'll be teacher-sat by a substitute, but it means that he thinks I'm ready for this. The only thing that makes me nervous is that I have been sheltered from the eighth graders a bit. However, most of that band is a little fearful of me and my newness to them, so maybe I can play on that. Plus, the percussion section likes me.

Somehow in the last week, everything snapped into place in my mind. I have become a teacher. I have the confidence, the drive, the passion, the energy. I'm taking charge and starting most of the lessons out. I've noticed that he's also let me take charge more as well this week. I know that I was allowed the night off from football pep band, and incidents happened, so I'm thinking that he's also realizing what I am capable of helping him with. Or at least being another adult there to help supervise.

I'll be taking half of band rehearsal tomorrow, and I came up with a good lesson plan for tomorrow for working with Festivo. I've noticed that when I conduct the high schoolers, they start to drag. SCT says he's noticed the same thing when he conducts them. He gave me some suggestions, and I intend to do a lesson with them that they hopefully won't forget. I intend to teach lightness to the group. I know that most of them can play light, but, I think that using a pink feather boa might help to reinforce some things, as well as create a lighter atmosphere with the group. 8:00 am is an early time of day to laugh, but I'm going to try to get them to do so.

I think what I'll have to do is wear it from the start of rehearsal to help enforce the "lightness" of the day. I've also decided that the "dramatic scene" that Nelhybel is describing is also a happier one than sad/angry/negative. So, if I approach the rehearsal with an aire of lightness, it will help. Plus, I'm planning on using the warm-up session to work with the lightness as well.

Tomorrow will be one for the record books. If it works and I don't lose control of the class.

"Festivo" Lesson Plan for 10/19/05:

Objective - Get group to play Festivo lighter and with more positive affect.

Strategies - Disguised repetition, Rote, Call and Response

Exercises - Warm-up with chorales. Use lighter affects with group. Show off boa - show lightness of feathers and how they move. Toss it around. Try chorales again. Start Festivo. When group feels too heavy, pass boa back to section that feels heaviest.

Assessment - Group won't be dragging as much as I conduct. Feel of music will change.

Of course, looking at this, I think I'll save the boa for more of a surprise. I'll try changing my stick technique, and then also take SCT's suggestion of starting them at a tempo and seeing where they go from there. If those fail, then I'll reach into the bag, take out the boa, and go into the lesson plan above.

Somebody wish me luck, cause I'm gonna need it.

emotions

2005-10-17T19:21:00.000-05:00

After the bell rang, and the day continued from my last post, I quickly discovered that it was going to be a bittersweet and emotionally trying day. All day I had people keep asking me if I had heard about the bus accident. I of course responded very kindly and said that it was a tragic thing that happened and that I had heard previously throughout the day. Suddenly, I'm expected to be an expert on the accident and am supposed to know what happened, who was involved, and not act as if I've been emotionally effected by it. All day, everyone who was not a band teacher kept asking me about this, when I would prefer, for the sake of my students, to pretend as if it didn't happen. It still makes me sick to my stomach.

The afternoon went fast at least. My students didn't ask about the accident thankfully, but it seemed as if they were all having just as trying of days. We got through lessons, some were really good, and then life just went on. Lives in high schools, at least once you are a teacher, don't really change much. It's comforting. I at least want to keep expanding my knowledge for the sake of my students, and things do change throughout a community, but not much really changes when you sit down and think.

It is awesome student teaching with someone who has been fortunate enough to have had the same job for thirty-six years. The first day of the semester he asked me how old I was in whichever year he started (2005-36=1969?) and the answer was that I wasn't even born yet. What's even weirder is that he is about the same age as my parents, and his daughter is both older than me and has children.

I've also been invited to observe the middle school band director (henceforth ECT). ECT invited me to come in as well and work with her flutes and I cannot wait. I have them for a full hour, which I know will go fast. I definately want them to hear some good flute music (NOT James Galway - his vibrato is too fast), and I want to give them each some personal attention. What I will probably do is go through SCT's or ECT's music to find a flute quartet to try with them - maybe. They're seventh graders after all. Maybe I'll write/arrange something easy for them. I guess that's what I'll work on next this evening.

Back to the grindstone...

tough emotions

2005-10-17T11:46:00.000-05:00

It's hard to hide emotions as a teacher, especially as a music teacher, and today I find myself trying to do just that. This weekend, our state and my profession made the news: http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/10/17/wisconsin.bus.crash/index.html. It didn't hit me until this morning when SCT was talking about this (I tried to ignore/forget it) and I overheard. Their student teacher from the school was one of the fatalities along with the driver, the band director, his wife, and their granddaughter. In my mind my brain is saying "It could have been me," over and over. When we go on our trip to Madison, I think I'll sit towards the back of the bus.

Then, that got me thinking about an accident that happened to a former band director from my high school who SCT was good friends with. Too many thoughts.

On a POSITIVE note: the day is going well. Typical Monday of sleepy students - typical lunch time of me trying to get ahead on lesson plans. My private lessons at DMS are going well, I just need to remember to call the student that AH referred on to me and get her on my schedule. Lessons at CHS are going well too - I just wrote out plans for the 8th grade percussionists that I work with, and have taken most of the lessons for today as well (the exception has been the trumpet students). I even have that "time management" thing down for the lessons now.

Also, updated my portfolio over the weekend - reworked several sections, scanned in a lot of documents, and added links throughout. My to-do list for it is down to a half page now, which is good. For those of you that don't follow Wisconsin education laws, the state has recently enacted PI-34, which requires additional testing and an electronic portfolio for all educators graduating from college after August 2004. Before, the university required a bound portfolio be turned in with all accredidation documents in the binder. Now, after collecting those document and having started with paper portfolios for my educ and mued classes, I need to scan those into the computer and assemble an electronic portfolio (which this blog is part of). At the bare minimum, the portfolio is complete, but there are many documents that I want to add in. Also, the university servers were down yesterday, which made my life difficult since that's where the documents are all stored.

Bell rang - lessons again!

easy lesson idea

2005-10-14T17:15:00.000-05:00

Today went well, everyone was in a good mood, and it was of course Friday. Eighth graders were a little hard to control as it was a Friday, but that's the norm in any classroom that I've been in.

Discovered today an easy way to work out lessons within an hour (eg: 45 minutes). We have our lesson schedule set up so that each student is assigned a time for their private lesson (yes, private, one-on-one). Students have the flexibility in their schedule that they can move their lesson to another time, so that SCT and I may have six students lined up total for an entire class period. Today, we overlapped jazz band and four lessons. Normally, I would start the lesson and SCT would finish it, and each student would get about ten to fifteen minutes each. At the end of the time, one of us (usually SCT as he knows the students' hiding spots) goes to find the students that did not come. This "search mission" usually lasts about fifteen minutes if the student is "MIA." Even if the student is in the general department area, it usually takes some time and listening skills to locate that student for their lesson.

Today, students were forced into the practice rooms seeing that jazz band was rehearsing in the band room with SCT, and his office picks up a lot of the sound from the rehearsals. So, three of our students went in practice rooms, and I went room by room and taught lessons. It worked really well. I was able to keep a really good pace, and each student didn't have to worry about moving their things from one room to another and to another. Plus, it was easier to locate the students for their lessons, and I had a moment after each to record a grade in the grade book and take any notes. I think that when I'm teaching on my own I will try to run lessons this way. It is a lot easier to work with, and the students are able to set up the room the way they feel most comfortable. Also, sometimes an office or large room setting can intimidate students into not playing their lessons as well. Allowing a student to pick a practice room helps them to control the setting which can take the nervous edge off a lesson.

The only downside to this is that if you need something from the office, you have to stop the lesson and go get the item. Also, the rooms are small and there are times where I want to use a large space to get a student to play out more.

really good lessons

2005-10-13T17:26:00.000-05:00

Well, today went quickly, and it was a good day, so I didn't want it to end. I conducted in the first hour rehearsal again, and it was a piece I hadn't conducted with them yet. Went okay - I need to both know it better and stop looking at the vocal and piano parts (Hallelujah Chorus). The students were responding to what I was doing up there, and it sounded good. I do know that when I am teaching on my own as a fully licensed teacher, I will definately need to take an hour or two each evening and devote it to score study and rehearsal preparation. I also know that when I am teaching later on, I should not have a private studio as well until I am more estabilished in my career.

Second hour brought me setting up a technology demonstration for third hour. The school has an older version of Finale and one of the students wanted a demonstration, so I opened it up for the music theory class and jazz band. Two students showed up, which is actually a lot for the size of the school and the specifics of the program. That went well, they knew more about Finale than they first let on, so we didn't do much there.

Then, one student had a phenomenal lesson. First, I remembered his name (once I remember a name, I generally remember it unless I am really tired, sick, or both). His lesson last week was rather poor, and we reassigned him the lesson page (and I gave him some exercises that would help his assignment). This week, he practiced, and made a phenomenal improvement. I was really proud of him, and so was SCT. The student meanwhile didn't really react as if it was anything.

I also discovered that another student has a better time of day for lessons. She has started moving around her lesson times because her first time was difficult for her to commit to. We have finally found a good time for her lessons, and it is making all the difference. She's gone from getting Cs and barely being able to play, to getting an A in her lesson today and making the assignment look easy.

I love teaching the private lessons. The students are able to accomplish more in the smaller groups than they are in large ensembles. Yes, large ensembles are valuable, but the students learn more and can take more responsibility in smaller groups.

accountability

2005-10-12T17:07:00.000-05:00

The radio caller last weekend may have been right. I listened to a webcast of a Joy Cardin interview (www.wpr.org) about the amount of homework a week or two back. One caller called in and mentioned that the problem with middle schoolers' behavior stems from the fact that in middle school, there is no accountability for a poor grade other than parental pressure. Elementary students have the fear of being held back a grade if they are not up to where they should be. High school students have the fear of not getting into the college or tech school that they want if they are not making the grade (and ours even has segregated study halls based on GPA). However, middle school students don't have anything of the sort. So, if a student fails math, all they have to do is take it over again in the summer. Seeing as most middle school students don't have jobs yet and don't like to spend all their free time at home, going to school during summer almost seems a reward at times. And, some students do have accountability for sports (needing a passing GPA or higher to play in the games).

Therefore, middle schoolers need something to be accountable for. These students are at the age where they are able to take responsibility for many things. Parents are giving these students responsibility as well. However, to me, the concept of "middle school as training for high school" just isn't cutting it. Maybe it would be okay for a year of training, but allow students to be held back that same year if they are not ready for high school. Either our current system of middle school is too structured or too lax, and I'm believing that it is the latter of the two. It seems to me that it is almost better to have students continue in the elementary setting for longer, but segregate grades 6-8 into another school. Let the eighth graders then commute between classes, but still keep those students accountable. If these students don't know something, moving on to harder classes where we build on that foundation of knowledge won't help them. Secure the educational foundation, then build upon it.

---------------------------------

Overall, today went well. Typical band teaching day - band, lessons, practicing (I had time to practice), jazz, lessons, lunch, lessons, eighth graders, lessons, sort music, lessons, some instrument repair, and go home. The above paragraphs are my thoughts for the day on education right now - more specifically middle school accountability. I'm starting to really like those eighth graders, they just need to do the following: learn about accountability/responsibility, paint the band room a darker color so it's not so bright. My attention kept wavering today in there - it was as if I had ADD or something today. I just couldn't keep my mind on anything during rehearsals. I finally had a day off from conducting - kind of nice, but I was bored stiff. Got to play drumset today, and it was easier than I remember (that's what happens when the entire percussion section is a combination of gone and injured). So, covering perc parts on set was a lot easier than running. Plus, played timpani as well - that's always fun.

I miss playing in Wind Ensemble and all those other things at the university.

Oh well.

because I really can't sleep...

2005-10-11T21:26:00.000-05:00

Latin fun (or ways to annoy your students):

http://www.columbia.edu/cu/augustine/arch/omnibus.html

creativity for english students

2005-10-11T21:10:00.000-05:00

Here is the newest way to confuse english teachers, and any other teacher for that matter:

http://www.fysche.com

The explanation for the language is here:

http://www.fysche.com/guide.htm

Have fun, and good luck fellow teachers!

Wisconsin State Teaching Standards

2005-10-11T17:49:00.000-05:00

Just in case anyone is curious, I'm posting the Wisconsin State Teaching Standards and the Wisconsin Music Teaching Standards as well below.

Wisc State Teaching Standards:

Teachers...
1.) Know the subject they are teaching
2.) Know how children grow
3.) Understand that children learn differently
4.) Know how to teach
5.) Know how to manage a classroom
6.) Communicate well
7.) Be able to plan different kinds of lessons
8.) Know how to test for student progress
9.) Be able to evaluate themselves
10.) Be connected with other teachers and the community

Wisc State Music Standards:

By graduation, students can...
1.) Sing, alone and with others, a varied repertoire of music
2.) Play, alone and with others, a varied repertoire of music on instruments
3.) Improvise music
4.) Compose and arrange music
5.) Read and notate music
6.) Analyze and describe music
7.) Evaluate music and music performances
8.) Relate music to the other arts and disciplines outside the arts
9.) Relate music to history and culture

red tape

2005-10-11T17:10:00.000-05:00

Ugh! Does it ever end? Ever since I've entered college, I've been mummified in red tape. "You can't take this class because ___________." "He can do it but you can't because ____________." "You can't student teach there because ____________." "You should change majors because ______________." I'm so sick and tired of it!!! If I had listened to one word of favoritism and red tape that I heard at college, then I would have been kicked out a long time ago. Of course, my not listening to the department on any of those statements above probably caused me to go on many hate lists, but if I hadn't, I wouldn't be where I am now. The music department changed as soon as that one professor left and the other one came. No offense to either of them, because I respect those two professors more than the rest of the department, however, it's just changed. I don't like what it has become, and neither have several teachers that I respect either.

My student teaching AWAY from the university is wonderful, and I'm glad that I've learned to work the system that is higher education to know how to make it work towards my advantage so that I can actually LEARN something other than how to walk from one department office to another and fill out PAPERWORK. I guess part of this anger and resentment towards my soon to be alma-mater is because of my mentor's reaction to the red tape that I've been going through (my mentor is my high school band director - phenomenal educator and the person who influenced me to go into music ed). Oh yeah, he heard the same red tape that I heard. Guess what? He didn't listen either.

Other than the red tape, today wasn't so bad. I really don't mind the eighth graders as much as I thought I did - they're shaping up nicely. There are a couple of musicians who I have begun to work with in smaller groups to bring to where they should be, and it will hopefully show in rehearsals now. Percussionists are still a handful, but they've now seen me use "the look" to them and they stopped doing whatever they were doing, and then they did something else and SCT responded with the same look. I feel bad for them because they are fine musicians and are pretty much being ignored (poor percussionists), however, they need to learn not to act out.

Then, I was observed again today. Went well. There's a couple of areas to improve in. Plus, I think the next two times SP comes he'll be either watching lessons, or a marching band rehearsal. Fun.

Taught a really good saxophone lesson today - actually a couple. I love playing duets with the students because it raises their musicianship levels, makes them sound better, and gives me a chance to play as well. It really relaxes me when I can hear/partake in good music, and it makes my students happy as well (because then I'm happy). I wish more of my lessons that I teach would be like that. Instead, it's just students telling me why they didn't practice yesterday (my response is "What about the other six days of the week?").

Slow day though - several students didn't show up, and we didn't have jazz band or other big rehearsals. Had two eighth grade sectionals - that was a little long for SCT, but I just tried to stay awake (you have to admit that it takes talent to fall asleep during an eighth grade brass sectional).

That's all for now. I'm sure there was something else I wanted to say, but I just can't remember it now.

long day

2005-10-10T18:48:00.000-05:00

I just got back from school/DMS about half an hour ago, forced myself to eat dinner, and am now going to spend the next two-three hours planning for tomorrow and doing paperwork (including this). I knew that there would be work to working, however, the whole private lesson thing is getting to me. You would think that students enrolled in private lessons would practice, as they are taking time from their schedules and money from their parents to partake in these lessons. Well, a few of my private students practice a little, and others don't practice at all. My students at school practice more than the private ones, because their grades depend on it. I'm sick of interupting my time at school to rush over to teach students who are wasting their time, mom's money, and my time. I want to drop them, but part of me tells me not to.

I guess part of me is expecting to find a student that was like me. True, I didn't always practice and there were problems with my playing (eg: tendonitis leading to the other problems), but I was worth it. Between my students at DMS, CHS, and CMS, there is one student at the caliber that I would really like to teach. The other option is to get my masters and try to find a college job. Even then, most of the students would be the same (how many college students where I went actually practiced? not many). Like I said before, at least the threat of grades is enough to get some to practice.

In other teaching fronts of similar nature, it seems like music has slid from being a core-curriculum class (if it ever was) to being an extra-curricular activity that meets during the school day for credit. With budget cuts nowadays, this is even more true. Gone are the days that students go to band to learn about music and perform, instead, they just want to go and take a class where they will have fun. An easy way to remedy this is to have two ensembles set up - one for playing harder music for students who would want to work for it, and another set up for students who just want to play for fun. An even easier option would be to start the kids younger so that they have time after school and on the weekends to practice. I spoke with one student today who enjoys playing, and loves it, however, he knows that he won't partake in music after high school and he doesn't have time to practice right now because he's trying to earn money for school and car insurance. Story of every student's life. I don't want to deny them music, but at the same time, music is just a fringe benefit of being in school in our country today. In European schools, most students learn an instrument in an after-school program. The US is relatively unique in the fact that music education is part of the core-curriculum.

The teaching band part of teaching band is everything that I thought it could be. The teaching lessons part of band is generally the same. The part I never expected when I chose the school and the major was the parents, advocacy, politics, grades, sports, red tape, meetings, and meaningless activities that have nothing to do with education that take place in schools. I enjoy teaching, it's just that I can't spend my free time outside of a school doing it anymore. I like having free time, especially since I didn't have any in college.

Ah, free time.

Back to the homework.

Friday's update

2005-10-09T16:44:00.000-05:00

I suppose it's time that I sit down and comment on Friday - the day I went back to university.

Friday was awkward and bittersweet. I arrived early and ran into a good friend whom I hadn't seen for several months. We talked and I invited him to the music ed lunch we were going to do later that day. It was really nice to see him, especially since I didn't think I would really see anyone that day that I would recognize other than music ed student teachers and a few professors.

Walking around campus was different too. I was in teaching clothes, because wearing jeans/t-shirt/jacket is now officially awkward. I walked differently from the other students, I looked differently, and even moved differently. Even though I'm still technically in college, I looked, acted, and felt like a non-traditional or graduate student. This is my sixth year in college, and I'm looking ahead to another one or two spread over the course of several years (more on that later).

I got a new ID card as well so that I can use the library when I'm on campus. Thankfully I didn't have to pay for it, but I had to surrender my old card. It doesn't make sense; all that work and hassle of getting a new ID so that I can use it maybe once. I'm not really going to any concerts, or eating meals on campus, or going to games. I might need it at the library, but everything I've needed there so far I can just use a copy machine for (with change, and no copy code).

It looks like my semester's registration will finally be fixed as well. I am enrolled in a class that I don't need to be enrolled in and won't be graded in, due to only one student teaching placement only. That's good. Unfortunately, my motive for going to the NFAC was thwarted by the fact that no one else was there, and the Sinfonians didn't have any coffee (SCT, this caffeine addiction is your doing!) because the Sinfonians weren't even there (that I could find).

The lecture portion of the class was okay. I have more work to do on my portfolio, but it's just scanning in items and finishing paperwork. Paperwork. There's a computer game my dad plays, Sim City, where there's an option for a "Paperwork Reduction Act" that is supposed to reduce the demands on the city somehow, but it just increases it. From what I gather, any field I go into will have that paperwork, and even more if you try to get away from doing it. I currently am attempting to fulfill the paperwork via low-tech means: pencil to paper and US postal service. I found out that the paperwork needs to be posted to my e-portfolio for the class, so I get to re-type those now. But, once I recreate the form, it will be easy to just fill in the blanks and go from there.

One good thing about the class on Friday - we found out about a new way to access the university servers from off-campus called Remote Labs. It works pretty well. The process of accessing a computer over fifty miles away is a little sluggish, and the HTML acts a little off, but it is faster than downloading/uploading the portfolio each time that I need to change something. That includes mapping the network drive and setting up the VPN connection as well, as this new computer doesn't like to keep that in its memory somehow.

Lunch was nice though. My friend from that morning didn't show up (he's pretty busy anyway), and I wish he had since it was one of his favorite restaraunts where they had sushi. Turns out most of us are student teaching in districts away from the university with the furthest one being a three hour drive away from campus. Most of us are a half-hour away. We all felt awkward being back, and several of us are ditching graduation to sleep-off concerts from that same week.

As far as next semester goes, it will be nice to finally be out of school, but that means trying to find a job. The best bet will be (for now) where my mom works, I just have to go through her medical terminology textbook and notes. I'm already looking at where to start graduate credits for the graduated licensing that is happening now through PI-34. There's a class through the university that I want to take that is overseas in London that deals with educational settings in other countries. It looks interesting, but I don't know if I have the money for it yet. I'm also looking at taking some science classes as well. This whole idea that popped into my head this summer (eg: too many of my friends/students have suffered injuries from making music) is slowly taking over my free time and I can't let go of it. I realized that over half of my private students, high school age and younger, are having problems from making music already. Over half. That's not right.

I spent the afternoon mapping out my possibilities to fix that problem in my mind, and the music ed degree is just the start.

Just the start.

That means more school.

Later.

Performance Pulse

2005-10-09T12:48:00.000-05:00

From the monthly bulletin, Performance Pulse, of the International Foundation for Performing Arts Medicine (http://www.ifpam.org/newspr.html):

PAIN Should NOT be Ignored

In a questionnaire mailed by IFPAM to over 200 percussionists, a question asked whether it was OK to experience pain when learning something new. Much to IFPAM’s dismay, an alarming amount of individuals answered “yes”. This philosophy will almost guarantee an injury. If pain is your body's signal that something is wrong, then how could it be good? This is especially true for instrumentalists. The human hand cannot tolerate the same stresses that other body parts do endure. If you try to ignore too much, usually you will have swelling in your hand. This in turn will lead to tightness and when the hand is moved again, it will hurt. And so, the vicious cycle continues....

To prevent injury, it is beneficial for artists of all disciplines to improve their total body fitness by exercising and cross training to maintain and improve overall physical fitness, i.e. participating in a number of different exercises. Rehearsing for a show results in adequate physical endurance for the length of that show but not necessarily for the next gig. It is better to ‘practice’ exercising for a longer length of time. -NP

simple pictures - a late night rambling

2005-10-06T20:23:00.000-05:00

I saw a picture the other day. It was nondescript, something you'd see everyday here in Wisconsin. In the picture, there were a couple of bulldozers, some men in hardhats, and a newly formed roadbase. There was nothing different about this picture. In fact, it looked like a place where I would want to spend some time to get away from everything - warm sun, country air, hills, those kinds of things. Then I read the caption and it hit me. The picture was of servicemen in Iraq and it was taken fairly recently by one of the teachers in our district serving over there.

It is odd when we begin to take pictures for granted. So many times, a picture tells us a story, be it fact or fiction. However, picture after picture bombards us on a bright television screen until they blur together and you callously assume that it is just another picture of a life. You forget that there is a war going on, that people are dying, that people are fighting for their nation, religion, etc... . Pretty soon, you realize that life goes on. You get up, go to work, come home, go to bed, and the process continues. That little box in your bedroom, living room, den continues to flicker night after night with more pictures, more stories to confuse you.

Time travels on. It seems like yesterday that I just entered college, walked into the dorm room, went to a party. Things that now seem so trivial seemed to matter the most at that time, and in a way they still do. Memories flood through our minds night after night on the twilight of our slumber, and all you can do is push them to the side. Lives go on. Countries go on. One superpower tries to dominate another as history repeats itself.

Being in the twenty-something generation, and having attended college, I know that this will continue until someone has the sense to find a way to pull our troops out. Then, there will be a period of peace, and when my generation is old enough to gain political control, it will repeat itself. It always does. David versus Goliath. It's just a matter of knowing which is the giant at the time.

In a way it is almost comforting knowing that our history will cycle itself around. You know what to expect from the next president, the next chapter in our country's story, as it is always the same. I remember in high school wanting to grow up and lead an adventurous life, wanting to have days that would be unpredictable. Now, I take comfort in the fact that I know which county I will be in next weekend, what I will be doing tomorrow night, who I will see in the morning. I used to scoff at people who were willing to live a life without surprises. Now, it is comforting to know what will happen next. Students grow up, graduate, have families, and pretty soon the children of those students are your students. Sometimes when I see the kids passing in the halls or practicing for their lesson I wonder what will happen to them over the next ten, twenty years. I see them as people I know now - they each remind me of other people I have met before. I can see them as adults, or even just high school seniors, looking back on their days in band. I hope I make a difference in their lives.

Maybe I just need to ramble, maybe I have a point. However, it is interesting to see what one little picture can do. Before the realization that the picture was from Iraq, the war seemed distant. Yes, I knew that it was going on, however, it seemed to be just another story on CNN, much like Katrina/Rita or any of the politics in DC. After seeing an actual picture that is connected to me somehow, it seems more real. I know people serving in Iraq and Afganistan. The downtime is spent as it would be spent in the US - surfing the internet, playing sports, partying, watching movies. The only difference is, the picture that I casually looked at one morning, the story in my mind, is their reality. Bring them home. We support them, and we hope for their safety, however, bring them home. Let them fill their albums with pictures of family, not warzones.

Maybe it's maturity, or maybe it's the fact that I'm ready to fall asleep for the evening. I'm not sure, however, I do know that we begin to secure ourselves in the small worlds we create among us. University students assume that life should be the way it is at the university. The most important thing is finding a decent meal and passing classes. High school students assume that the world exists around that school (and ironically, their priorities are about the same). Middle school students - well, we won't try to change the world yet on that.

It's just amazing the fact that each person's story over here is unity in a variety - the basic plot outline is the same. However, it's the small details that go unnoticed that are amazing. One of my students is in a rock band (and is promising me a copy of her demo). Two want to continue in music education (and I am there constantly waiting to answer any question). Another is planning to get her graduate degree in Finland. These little details don't really change much over time, despite what is happening on a global scale. Students continue to be students. Parents, parents. Teachers seem to be an almost unchanging truth in rough waters, a beauty of knowledge that holds together hope. There will always be teachers there for students to rely on. Life goes on, the teacher teaches and observes, passing that knowledge on to each generation as it enters the class.

long day

2005-10-06T16:55:00.000-05:00

Ever have one of those days where the time just seemed to drag on? And you didn't really have anything to do? Well, it was one of those days where our school seemed to have gone through the Twilight Zone or something. I mentioned half the day earlier but I didn't mention the part that convinced me that there is some major event happening that no one knows about: the eighth graders were wonderful.

We went over to the middle school for eighth grade band as always (and drove?). We got there, and they played well, didn't misbehave, and even the habitual truants showed up (which means that it's definately cold outside). The percussionists were respectful to SCT and I, and everyone was cooperative. Either the weather has gotten to them, or the fact that midterm was yesterday has. The high schoolers today acted the way the middle schoolers usually do. Definately the Twilight Zone.

Then, tomorrow I get a "day off." I have to go to the university for a class, which means skipping a rehearsal and several lessons that I don't want to miss. Oh, and finalizing mid-term grades. I'm going to miss that. Each time I do something with grades I feel more like a teacher. That reminds me, I need to e-mail SCT to add a grade to the book for a student. I'm also going to miss the fact we're reading the Curnow arrangment of Russian Christmas Music (watered down from Alfred Reed's). I love that piece. I want to play that piece. I might even be on bassoon for it, we'll see on that one though. I'm going to miss seeing the sleepy students trying to wake up enough for band. Instead, I have to get up at the same time as normal, drive an hour, run errands around campus, and then sit in a hot stuffy classroom without a computer for the morning listening to a professor talk about I don't know what but it's probably going to be something I don't want to hear. Then, I get to sit in a computer lab for two hours doing nothing because about twenty or more people will be sharing the same scanner. Lots of fun.

I'd much rather go to school tomorrow than the university.

score study

2005-10-06T11:38:00.000-05:00

One of the pieces of music that we are doing for the concert is Festivo by Vaclav Nelhybel. It is a wonderful work, ironically graded as a B level (2-3 about). I say ironically because it is difficult to conduct. I know I'm still young, but this is several steps above any band suite by the English composers, or even some of the pieces by Alfred Reed. I'm up for the challenge, however, taking the time to do sufficient score study is hard. I thought I did enough, but suddenly, I need to know more. I need to be able to be inside Nehlybel's mind almost.

Also, I can't decide if the piece should be more jubilant or warlike. Nelhybel describes it as "...an overture type composition in which the woodwinds and brass are constangly confronting each other like two antagonists in a dramatic scene." Great. Dramatic scene. So, make it like a fight scene in Shakespeare? If so, which work by him? I've tried to research it, however, I've only found one article on the piece and little on Nelhybel. Even then, the article is not online, so I'm once again limited.

I miss having access to a good library system. Even though the one at college wasn't the best, it was far better than the run of the mill community library. I could at least get things on inter-library loan easily. I've gone to three separate libraries in this area and have gotten nothing.

Another thing I'm encountering is the fact that I'm mirroring my hands as I'm up there. If I try to get away from it, students then get lost. However, there's so much that needs to be cued that I need to get away from mirroring so that I can cue.

I'm glad I'm up for a challenge.

podium time again

2005-10-06T09:25:00.000-05:00

Just finished the first hour rehearsal and did some copies afterwards (page turns). Yikes. I tried to not talk as much today as before, and not only did I talk more, but I was completely uncomfortable and lost probably 75% of the group. This is the first time I've been told that I talk too much - both by SP and SCT. Previous classes, I was never told that, and so I'm wondering if this is a new habit, or if it's just gone unnoticed. This is so hard!

The other thing is that I need to give them a reason why we stop. I stop so we can stay in a specific section. Maybe I need to say that. I stop to fix things - which I think I tell them. Ugh. Why is this happening now? I didn't have a problem in CBD's classes with this. Why now?

I want to find a room, hide in it for awhile and then emerge refreshed and ready. Then I'll go and drive to the university and find some of my former profs and talk.

I guess I should have expected this after dreaming last night that this was going to happen today.

the biggest day in music education

2005-10-05T16:53:00.000-05:00

Today was Pizza Delivery Day!!!!!!!! The Biggest Day in Music Education that EVERY classically trained musician LOVES!!!! (Hey, I've got several of my next meals planned for awhile!) The group that sells pizzas with us is really good to its schools and its teachers - everything is set-up for delivery ahead of time and they really do all the work. All you have to do is display a poster, setup a time for introduction and delivery, and then sit back and eat pizza. The only big this is to remind the kids to pick up pizzas and have parents ready with vehicles. All but two band students picked up their boxes, which is pretty impressive.

It's also concert season now, meaning it was a very musical day. Away are the uniforms and marching shoes, and in are the folders, stands, and good music. Yesterday was the official first rehearsal of music, and it went okay despite being observed. Today went much better as I was in the percussion section all day. Ironically, the music SCT and I selected for the rehearsal was all sacred-based music. We have no idea how that worked out at all. However, one of the pieces was one I'll be co-conducting at the choir concert and another was one my college band director did with us last school year (On a Hymnsong of Philip Bliss). Actually, SCT told the band about CBD (my college band director/conducting prof/mued prof) . CBD came and did a conference honors band last school year at that school where they played one of the songs we played today. SCT continued to tell this story about how CBD told the ensemble that day to watch him as he was not going to conduct the piece the same way. I got to listen to the recording of that concert following the rehearsal and it was wonderful to hear it as it was one of the more musical renditions of it that I've heard in awhile. Plus, I love the piece and CBD is a gifted conductor.

Jazz band went well also. We got the new charts in for the next concert and there are a couple of good teaching pieces in the batch. All are re-arrangements of older standards, so we'll be able to introduce the students to the literature and the language. We also had the guests from Germany with us this week. Monday brought two guests, and today brought most of the twenty. So, we put on a mini-concert for them. I played with the altos and SCT was on trumpet. There were times that we did rehearse and teach, it is still a CLASS after all, however, we ran a couple of charts for the guests. I love having an audience in a rehearsal, and here is why. When students know that there is an audience, they suddenly start playing at a higher level of concentration. Most of the time, everything then lines up and real music is made, however, there are still times that the additional pressure throws the students off. That's when there's trouble.

Choir and band are combining to do Hallelujah Chorus for the choir concert, and not only did we rehearse that today, however, the choir did as well. So, I sat in on part of the choir rehearsal and managed to get MANY questions answered. Turns out that RS (the choir teacher at the high school) is taking the areas that have a tutti ensemble line at a piano dynamic. This changes my approach to the score study.

Off to do more score study. Which is in the car. Outside. I'll just get up a little earlier tomorrow.

long day

2005-10-04T19:13:00.000-05:00

Wow, being observed this morning really took it out of me for the rest of the day. Not much happened after first hour, other than I learned the hard way to lay off the caffeine a bit. I get to go to a convention in November for the school district - it's meant for solo and ensemble festival which I'm getting trained into more. I've done all the scut work for the festival on the day of the festival, however, I haven't done any of the lead-up work prior to the week of. So, they're training me into it, and I get to see the new center for music education near Mad-town which just opened two weeks ago. I'm excited about it; it is a center created for the educators in Wisconsin to use for anything that they might need. It has several libraries, recording studios, rehearsal rooms, etc..., everything you would need for teaching music is there at that building. I'm hoping the concept stays around for awhile because it is definately something that I'm planning on using, especially if my budget is lower.

Well, I really just want to get to bed.

observation #1

2005-10-04T09:32:00.000-05:00

Well, I just saw off SP for his trip back to the university after my first time being observed. Wow. I need to get back into swimming or weights or something through the Rec Center here at school. My arms were already tired five measures into the piece, and now my hair is soaked as well. It would help if I didn't force the baton so much.

The only negative criticism that SP had was that I still talked too much. Oh well. That's something I need to keep working on. At least I got a good comment on my eye contact; apparantly my head wasn't buried in the score. I still keep comparing myself to my conducting professor - that's the level that I want to be at right now, and it's driving me nuts.

Gotta go - time to teach a lesson.

a student

2005-10-03T19:16:00.000-05:00

I forgot to add this in earlier.

I have a student. A wonderful student who I enjoy teaching; she's talented and could easily out-play anyone in her section. However, she's hypercritical of herself and because if it doesn't believe that she can accomplish anything. She'll tell me in her lessons that she can't play something, go to play it, play it correctly, and then pick apart one tiny little thing that she thought was off and say "See, I told you so." Then I say, "Told me what? You just played it correctly." The entire lesson is like that.

Today, she had SCT for her lesson and I sat back and watched. She did the same thing and I just wanted to yell to her that she was perfectly capable of doing this. She went off on a tangent and SCT (who was outside the bandroom) asked me afterwards what had happened and why she went off like that.

It is so hard for me to see a student do that to herself. I want to help her, but I don't know how. SCT told me that more than likely she'll find her own fate on her own, which I agree with, because the system is not set up to help out people who need "just a little help." Instead, this student, who is smart but lacking confidence, will fall through the cracks and probably end up in the last place she wishes to be. I've told her that if she ever wants to vent that she should come and talk to me and that I would listen. I hope I can get through to her, because if I can it will be wonderful. If I don't, then I will know that I have at least tried. However, I just want her to succeed.

the petri dishes

2005-10-03T18:56:00.000-05:00

One month in, and I'm sick again. I enjoy teaching, the students, the music, but those kids need to learn to practice preventitive measures against GERMS!!! About half of the high school band is sick, my parents are sick, my mom's office is sick, and my grandma's apartment building is also sick. So, I went through the day with a combination of withdrawal from cold medicine and aleve along with a sore stomach. Not the ideal setting for dealing with the eighth grade petri dishes.

The high school petri dishes aren't that bad. Well, most of them. There's one that's really annoying to both me and SCT, and I always get stuck teaching that lesson. It went well, but it was right after two hours of the eighth grade petri dishes, and the only way those dishes remember anything is through continual repetition. Gotta love the toxic waste dump of hormones during puberty. I've figured out that the main reason the dishes behave that way at that age is due to hormones. Girls have been noticing boys for awhile, but none of the boys are mature enough yet. Then, some of the boys are just getting to the point where they like girls, a lot. Those are the boys that pick on the other boys for either having crushes, girlfriends, or not having gone through puberty yet. Throw that entire group together, stir in a very relaxed learning environment, and an environment that does not detain for problems, then the resulting formula is not a good one.

However, one good thing is that if I do end up at a middle school (I like them in smaller groups), I have the hope and the promise to myself that things will be run the way I want them to be run. SCT and I were talking about this today. He mentioned that the middle school band serves as both a feeding program for the high school, but also a place where the fundamentals are taught. A good director of that age-group will be able to do those things as well as keep peace with the students. SCT also says that it takes time for the students to adjust to the new teacher. So, there's still hope for me if I get into a middle school situation. I like that age group for the fact that more of them are enthuesiastic about band still at that age. By the time they get to high school, a lot of them are hardened into having to follow core classes and prioritizing other things before school. Middle schoolers are just starting to explore extracurriculars, so getting them into band is easier because they want to explore it, and they are more apt to follow-through on the expectations for their grade.

I do know one thing, if I keep getting sick like this, then there's a good chance I'll go into music business instead. I was healthier when I worked at Wal-Mart than I am now.

the day after

2005-10-01T16:38:00.000-05:00

Well, it's the day after homecoming, and I am happy to report that I have not had to clean up anything in my yard. I've never crashed so hard from events though. All I've really done today was try to find an article from The Instrumentalist about score study on Nelhybel's Festivo. No luck. So, I've just been relaxing and doing little things around the house that needed to get done. Oh, and now there's four beetles on the outside of my window; the worst part (jokingly), is that they're not in step.

I've also been working a bit more on my future band handbook for wherever I teach. Not that I wish to change the program entirely, but it's just a way for me to keep track of rules that I want to enforce and guidelines that will help my future students. I now also enjoy marching band more than I did at the beginning of the semester. I went to call TS to tell her about the gigs, only to discover that the slip of paper with her phone number on it is at school right now. Sorry TS.

Looking forward to Monday with the exception of the fact that I'm already hearing students complain about their chair placements. My music ed prof had a good idea when he told us about blind auditions, and that's what I'm going to do eventually. That way, students know that their auditions are based on ability and not popularity (not that they are based on that ever). Something that I did notice though when SCT and I went through and did the assignments was that there are some students who have the talent but not the responsibility for where we placed them. At the same time, there are students who have the sense of responsibility for the placement that were still placed below students who were more talented. So, looking back at my previous statement, is it right to assign chair placements solely on the basis of talent? I'm beginning to wonder. I like the idea of the blind audition, but knowing that the same procedure would/could place irresponsible persons in places of power also scares me.

Wow, all that from a quick update.

I forgot...

2005-09-30T21:27:00.000-05:00

to mention the most important thing. We have a tradition throughout our state that you go toilet papering during homecoming week. SCT didn't get hit by it yet (the first time). I haven't gotten hit since high school, and even then the kids knew my parents would call the cop shop. However, someone came by our house twice last night with a loud muffler and a car description similar to one of my students'. I won't be able to relax tonight until late because I really don't want to clean up a yard full of toilet paper. However, I hear that many of the students are leaving extra rolls for their favorite teachers... .

toilet paper

2005-09-30T20:59:00.000-05:00

Just got back from the game and we were winning 20 to 7. The halftime show went well, and so did the pep session and the parade. I even discovered that my key card to get into the school actually does work. They trust me with a key to the school, and apparantly not a key to the room that I teach in. Go figure.

The parade really made me feel like a teacher. We snaked througout the city, hitting each school and government office. Thankfully, we were at the beginning of the parade behind the emergency officials. What was really interesting was how the entire parade had to stop at major intersections. The main route was also a state highway with a couple of county highways crossing it, so we couldn't block traffic the entire time. I am amazed at the amount of organization and planning it took to pull the festivities all together. The WIAA had to plan the game and date, the school administration had to announce the date and set guidelines for... . You know, thinking about it really makes my head hurt. Just planning to have a band march in a parade is enough work. There's picking out music, ordering busses, double-checking the route, shortening the route (or trying to), avoidance of pranksters, rehearsing marching, rehearsing music, pep band, half-time show, fitting uniforms, checking uniforms, fixing uniforms, packing up for the parade, paperwork to be in the parade, and the list goes on. Remind me to ask SCT about what he had to do for this parade, and also for pep band (though I got most of it tonight).

I'm really proud of what those kids accomplished today. I looked up at the band in the stands at one point while sitting with my parents (who like me are not sports fans - yes, I know, long career ahead of me) and saw how exhausted they were. They have put their full energy - mind, body, and spirit - into every event this week and pulled off some amazing work. They literature they played on the field tonight was learned in about seven rehearsals and they sounded as if they were professionals.

One key trick I discovered today was to learn how to gauge (sp?) your energy for a performance. I am someone who usually likes to put 150% into everything, and then 200% for performances. I quickly discovered about one block into the parade today not to do that. I discovered that if I allowed myself to relax throught the performances and rehearsals that I performed better at whatever I was doing and I enjoyed it more as well. The parade route was a snap once I didn't follow corp form as much, it even seemed shorter than it really was. Throughout my entire life I've pushed myself to exhaustion, only to discover now that it really isn't the most effective method. The most effective method is to pace yourself and to plan ahead for the energy that you will need. I wish I had known this early in my college career, however, I am glad that I know this now as I have a good forty years of teaching ahead of me.

homecoming

2005-09-30T11:49:00.000-05:00

Well, it's the middle of the day, and since it's also homecoming, we have cancelled lessons for today so there isn't much to do right now. I thought that the reason why we did this was solely because students would be too busy, but then SCT asked a student if playing a make-up lesson would wear him out for later. Then I remembered two things: one, these are students and they are not used to playing for 12 hours a day, and two, they have a 1.3 mile parade, two pep band gigs, and a halftime show to play in still, and this was after a rehearsal this morning. Yeah, real smart Amanda.

My IAWM fall journal came yesterday, and I thought I wouldn't have time to read it. That's changed. I'm enjoying being able to sit down and just read something of interest. It's given me some ideas as well. There was an article in there about composing for womens choirs and how no one is doing it. There's also an announcement about it's 2006 composition contest that I qualify for two categories for right now, four if I become imaginitive. The category I wish I could enter I aged out of already, and I am too young for the other one I want to enter. So, I have three pieces, I just have to finish one, and then I'll decide what I want to enter. Easy.

This afternoon will be interesting. I'm looking forward to it, and I'm prepared for it as best as I can. That parade worries me; my ankle is still bad from the sprain three years ago, and I'm supposed to be in physical therapy for it, but I don't have time. So, I've been taking aleve and have my ankle wrapped and I'm wearing good shoes. However, I'm officially preparing for the worst after the parade. As long as I can make it to the end of the game I'll be alright.

busy day and middle schoolers

2005-09-29T16:03:00.000-05:00

Wow. Today was busy, but not in a work-overload type of busy, but many small things to do type of busy. We did our last street rehearsal before the parade tomorrow, and it looks like the parade will be about 13 city blocks long. Not that big of a deal since I won't be wearing a uniform, flip-folder, lyre, or instrument, but it will be long. The rehearsal went really well though, the kids are ready for the parade and they both look and sound wonderful on the street.

Taught a few lessons today. I'm picking up SCT's time management better now than I had before. The lessons were all quick and painless. One student is better already than I am after studying it in college. She's not sure what she wants to continue in, but she's good enough to play in an orchestra later in life as a professional. That was a wonderful lesson. I just sat back and relaxed and enjoyed her playing. I'm looking forward to that lesson next week.

Middle schoolers. At lunch today, one of the english teachers asked me how I enjoyed going to the middle school. And, the rest of the lunch hour was spent with me listening to horror stories from the other high school teachers about their encounters with middle schoolers, and then me proceeding to go over to the middle school after that. Ugh. I told the students that if they needed copies of music to let me know at the end of their rehearsal and that I would make the copies for them. How many kids gave me music to copy? None. How many copies did I have to make today? About six, and that was for only half the band. It's as if the only effective way to get information to stay in a middle schooler's head is to constantly repeat it, and even then they won't listen. Well, on the bright side, every teacher in that lounge today said that they were never meant to teach middle school and apparantly I'm one of them. Middle school teachers are saints and geniuses and I applaud every single one of them.

I have to laugh though, even the high school students currently want nothing to do with the eighth graders; they all played pep band together on Friday, and that was interesting. One kid (clarification - kid=eighth grader, student=high schooler) was dangling his saxophone from his neckstrap over the edge of the bleachers. I saw this but was caught in the crowd of students so I asked one of them to help me out as she was at the edge of our group and tell him that he could damage the saxophone that way. She was happy that she could help out, but I feel bad because I really should have gone to do that. My mistake. Now, I hope the kid doesn't hate me for sending the student. I think he's being shunned by his section or something because this kid refuses to join in with them and the boys in his section mock him a bit. The girls meanwhile all have little crushes on him, and he wants to be bigger and more "macho" than he is so he's isolating himself to prove he's not what he appears to be. Middle school really is rough.

The other big project of the day was to get the uniforms in order for tomorrow, which was not easy. Even though each student had a nametag on their uniform, they are stored out of order and it is hard to find a specific size for the students. Also, if you are looking for a specific number, you can't just go to that area of the rack and look for it, you have to go uniform by uniform and look at the ID number on the tag. I remember in mued class last year we discussed the art of delegation and how it helps a band director to stay sane with all of the jobs that need to be done. Sorting uniforms was definately one of the jobs listed that we could delegate out to someone, and in the future, I am so doing that.

Looking to the future, I wonder what my school will be like when I get there. I am hoping everything is organized in some way that I can decifer it, if not it will be hard. I hope that all uniforms and instruments are turned in so that they will also be easier to sort through. I hope that I will be able to find the sheet that has all of the locker combinations on it, or that the locks at least have the correct numbers affixed to them somehow. I hope that I will have at least some budget to work with (greater than $500 would be nice). I hope I get a job and that there will be jobs out there too. Subbing (and that includes for middle school) is not my idea of a dream job for the rest of my life. I'm glad that I have some good professional contacts already established that will vouch for me.

Well, time to find the things I need for tomorrow...

clarinet repair

2005-09-28T18:18:00.000-05:00

Wow, I am so glad I was not SCT today. He led the eighth graders through sight-reading. Classroom management NIGHTMARE!!!!! The kids were good while they were warming up, however, when they went to tune, one girl needed an instrument repair. SCT started that while I was sorting and handing out music, and at the same time as the ensemble was tuning. All of a sudden, the brass decided to see who could play loudest. I snapped with a conducting gesture right away to get them to quiet down, and all of a sudden SCT did the same as well as yelling at them. They did okay while listening to the recordings of the pieces, however, as soon as they sight-read it, SCT had the same problem with them that I did the day that I took them through the same lesson plan with different music. As soon as part of the group starts to get a little frustrated, the rest of the group snaps and it's world war three all of a sudden. SCT couldn't even get them in-line at one point. I'm almost a little glad that I got to see someone with 36 years of teaching experience go through what I went through, however, I felt sorry for him at the same time because it was a true nightmare.

In other news, I learned how to re-pad a clarinet today. I went to teach a clarinet lesson, and the student was assigned (by SCT) a duet to play with another student who was in a voice lesson at the time. So, I got my clarinet and went to play the lesson with her, and it was as if I was blowing through one of those little coffee straws with someone clamping down the other end. Some sound came out, but it was incredibly hard to get. So, I apologized and when I got a chance took the clarinet apart and saw that four pads had practically disintegrated in the keys. I knew that it needed some work, especially since I paid only $100 for it (used wood Selmer Signet 100) to begin with and it has pretty much sat untouched ever since (and before that as well). So, I showed the keys to SCT who confirmed that a re-pad was in order on most of it.

I called up TS at DMS and she said it was okay for me to come. Since I was coming I brought the said cornet from a previous entry with me. I re-padded the clarinet, and re-seated most of the pads. It plays better now than it ever did, and I saved myself probably $200 doing this (I let go some minor adjustments I can do on my own that would be done in a shop). Then, it took four of us to get the mouthpiece out of the cornet. Four. None of us at DMS or CHS have seen a mouthpiece so stuck before, but there's always times for a first.

shoots and ladders

2005-09-28T12:02:00.000-05:00

Well, I just discovered that I can update my blog from school - this may help me save time at night when I'm home and incapable of typing well at that time.

I had a chance to direct the jazz band again today. It seems like it's always a good group to "experiment" with as it is the same size as my mued class was last year and the kids are good sports about what I try. I'm still trying to adapt to the pacing of this school. Why is it so hard for me to do this? It is slower pace than college, but my college ensembles were slower pace than the ensembles here. This transition from college back to high school is so hard, and I know that right now, this is all just one big transition into my professional life.

I've been doing score study this morning for Vaclav Nelhybel's Festivo, and the whole pacing thing of rehearsals is really coming back into my mind. There are so many things that I want to do in rehearsals, and I just want to dig deeply into the music, however, there just isn't time. Give the students music at their level, and there's no time to teach them/perfect the music. However, give them music below their level, then they decide it's so easy that they don't need to practice it or pay attention to the details within the piece.

The jazz ensemble here has been doing easier pieces than they are capable of. It's good and it's bad for the reasons discussed above. However, I heard them play today like a college level group, if they just focus on the articulations. If they can do that, then it will be easier for them and I cand delve into the music even deeper. It's like going up rungs on a ladder: we're on one rung and I know that they can get to the next one, it's just that I have to continually remind them of that and then pull them up. The next rehearsal, they've fallen back to the beginning rung. If I could just motivate them enough, and keep them motivated for the days that they don't meet, then they will stay on the new rung and we can keep moving upwards. Unfortunately, that's just not happening yet.

Meanwhile, the SP comes from the University on Tuesday morning when we'll be sight-reading Festivo. This will be interesting. SCT keeps telling me to play it safe with timing and use teaching by rote, even though neither of us agrees that it is an effective method to be used all the time. I keep thinking of the trouble of suzuki string students transitioning into reading music, and I don't want my students to have that same metaphorical trouble.

Well, next hour is the eighth graders; wish us luck.

classical music

2005-09-27T21:23:00.000-05:00

I love teaching, and I generally enjoy my students, however, I miss the little world of classical music that I was surrounded by while in residency as a college student (and I question right now, as I am quite tired and have had a bad day, am I saying that to convince myself or to tell the reader that I'm about to rant about something?). At college, I went from 7:30 am to 3:30 am being surrounded by classical music (yes, you read that correctly), and now, I go from 6:45 am to 7:20 and then sometime after school surrounded by the classical music that I love. The other times? Pep band.

Why am I suddenly feeling this way? I went to the New World Symphony site just now, and I shouldn't have. All it did is remind me of this emptiness that is left in me without good classical music, or at least discussion of it with people just as wacky as me who are just as stuck in this world of music. I miss being able to run to the FAC at any time in the day and hear music - GOOD music being practiced.

The other reason I feel this way? I practiced flute today. I played Karg-Elert etudes for about an hour, and I was exhausted afterwards. I used to have the stamina to play the entire book. Now, I have the stamina to play any instrument better than a beginner (yeah, that hour of flute killed my saxophone/clarinet/euphonium chops) but not to where I was three months ago. This makes me mad. I at one point had said that everyone of my students will hear me practice music at some point. And what am I doing? Running errands, doing score study, running to the middle school to OBSERVE, etc... . I am sick of being a spectator - let me teach or something so that I can get on with my life and continue to live within my world of classical music. I miss practicing, I miss composing, I miss running to a concert last minute dressed in jeans and an old t-shirt with my hair pulled behind a scarf. I miss not wearing make up. I miss sleeping late and then practicing for hours at a time in pajamas in the FAC.

So, what to do, what to do. I miss academia. One thing that I've noticed a lot this semester is that I'm really "not in Kansas anymore." Suddenly, the world of sports and jocks is more important than anything else, whereas last semester I had several jocks come up to me and say that they wished that they had a chance to do music in high school. Two different worlds. Let me back in the old one please?

???

2005-09-27T18:35:00.000-05:00

I don't really know what to make of today? It was homecoming week, and so the students were all wild, which I don't mind and I actually want to partake in, but to still try to have them focus on something is really hard. All day it was just more the novelty of students wearing costumes, and, it just killed any chance at teaching today. How do you get the students involved in band when they're dressed up as cowboys and construction workers? I know of some ways, but none that would really work when you're trying to keep them at attention for marching.

I'm going to have to keep track of all of the excuses students come up with, alphabetically, as to why they don't practice. Then, on my thirtieth birthday, I can retire a millionaire after it's published and just watch other teachers as their students use the excuses on them (A Million and One Reasons Not To Practice). And, I'm not that far away from thirty.

Then, I taught lessons today at DMS. By taught I mean sat at the counter for two hours waiting for students to show up and none of them did. At least all of them showed up yesterday, but, it was really a waste of my time to be there doing NOTHING. And to make matters worse, the student that was supposed to show up last said that she would come and bring the money she owed from LAST week's lesson today. So, I'm still out $15. Two new policies: you need to have the money at the beginning of your lesson and if you don't show up for two weeks in a row without bothering to notify me in some way, then I'm done teaching that student. It's not that I don't care about my students, it's just that these 70 hour weeks need to stop, and if you're making me wait for you while I could be doing something else (like this), then I'm going to have a problem with it. It's one thing for students to not show up for their lessons at school - there, the district is paying for a teacher to staff that room - however, when it's a private teacher relying on funds directly from their students, then that's money that I can both get elsewhere doing something else instead of waiting for a student to show up, and that I can't use to buy groceries or pay the bills.

Schools have just changed drastically since I was a student, and I just can't figure out how. The kids are not as respectful as they were when I was one, and I know the culture in general is heading in that direction, however, it's just tougher than it used to be. Even though I am just separated from my students by five years, I remember it being more care-free than it is now. Yes, we had the same pressures, but it seems like students are being pulled away from their interests more for classes that just look good to a college. Even then, there are several of our students that are currently averaging under 50% for their grade right now. Even though these students care for what they do, band is more of a recess to them. I didn't get into this to babysit kids while they socialize and just have music going in the background. It really bugs me. I love music and I went into mued to share that love with future generations, and now, it's more like I can't even get through to them. Yes, they like to learn and want to learn, but there just isn't the dedication there that was there five, six years ago. Maybe my music ed prof was right in telling me that I should go into music business - at least there I'd be surrounded by people who are as passionate about music as I am.

evolution

2005-09-26T19:03:00.000-05:00

So I was reading through my older entries tonight and something struck me - I have started refering to my cooperating teacher as if his initials are SCT. His initials are not SCT - that is an acronym for Secondary level Cooperating Teacher. It struck me how things have evolved throughout this blog.

bullies (adendum)

2005-09-26T18:46:00.000-05:00

One more thing. Ever since doing grades on Friday, I'm beginning to feel and act more like a teacher. It is easier for me to discipline students on the spot and approach them now and feel like that is what I'm supposed to be doing. Overall, my comfort zone is expanding and by the end of the semester, I hope to have little anxiety over classroom management. I'm even going to have more tries at the eighth graders too!

bullies

2005-09-26T18:27:00.000-05:00

Well, today was the official kick-off of homecoming festivities at CHS/CMS and everyone, minus the teachers, wore pajamas. Every student was also in a state of semi-consciousness all day because of it (why did they make pajama day to be Monday?). And since all of the students were half-asleep, the teachers could only get through to them half the amount of time (is this even making sense right now?).

It is interesting to be back in a school for homecoming. One of the students Friday at pep band begged me to wear something this week to follow spirit week and I wanted to wear pajamas, however, I know that me wearing pajamas all day on a Monday means that I would end up sleeping on the floor of SCT's office and then at DMS while teaching lessons. Not a good idea (see TS, if you're reading this tonight, I mentioned you and the store!).

So, I'll probably partake in the festivities at somepoint this week other than just Friday when I wear the school colors for the parade and halftime show that night. Tomorrow, I'll probably wear scrubs with the Halloween jacket that kind of matches them. I don't know what Wednesday is, but Thursday I'll be able to wear my college clothing and get away with it! That means that I get to go through about two dozen university t-shirts and pick something (more specifically, five t-shirts that promote that other music store). It will be fun. The best part of being a teacher right now is that I can get away with being a total geek about school spirit and the subject that I teach.

On a more serious note however, I was teaching a lesson today and the student told me that he/she was being bullied. I got the information about who/when/where and told him/her that I'd pass it along to SCT and the administration and then thanked him/her for telling me and reassured him/her that we'd try to catch this creep without this affecting the student too much. I then told the student that it was in our interest as teachers to create the safest learning environment possible so everyone can feel secure and do their best.

It just really bugs me. Here, the students and teachers and school district in general are doing their best to make sure that this school is the best; they've even built a new school a few years ago and it is one of the most beautiful campuses I've been on. And what happens? A couple of kids decide that they want to ruin it for everyone by making themselves feel physically superior to the kids that are skinny and smart and are just good kids all around. I wanted to student teach at CHS because the kids are really great kids, then I find out that there are bullies there. I guess you just can't escape them. Hopefully notice will be spread throughout the teachers to patrol the outside of the school more carefully.

Then, one of the coolest eighth graders today was having a bad day, and I've noticed that he kind of spends more time by himself than not while sitting in his section (there's always a seat between him and the other players). And, the kid has an awesome sound on his instrument! SCT thanked him in band for sounding so good today, and that's a rarity! I'm going to try to get into his brain a little and see what's bugging him. SCT and I don't have access to his demographic information via Grade Book, but I'm sure I can figure out what's going on in his brain (other than just the horror that is eighth grade and puberty).

I just want to keep my students safe.